The meaning of Caliradine

A little scribble with no ending

2009-06-30T12:57:00.001+01:00

Sometimes I wonder by going home would it be a better thing to do though it would be like losing a personal battle to choose comfort above anything else.

Back home...

A typical weekend could be hanging out with close friends having a chat over coffee and cakes in the alfresco shielded from the baking summer.

Or a tan by the beaches in Sentosa.

Or roller blading by the endless stretch of East Coast Park. Stopping to have an ice cold sugar cane juice with lemon by the hawker mid way. Enjoying the nice warm breeze congratulating my efforts.

Or evening meals with family, being adventerous, trying out all sorts of cuisine.

How many shoes and bags can a girl have?

2009-02-27T22:45:00.006Z

MANY! MANY!

But a girl can never have too many. I certainly don't. *Looks away from gazes*

*Changes topic*

After coming home from a busy and exhausting week at work I decided to have a nice relaxing evening. So how would one relax? Like watching the tele? Neh, done too much of that the past couple nights. Like reading a book or comic? Well... I do have the Watchmen comic Dan loan me to complete before the movie's out early March! Wish me luck peeps.

Well... Do you know that counting can actually be very theraputic. I'm about to let you on one hell of a counting experience. So to relax a bit, I decided to dig out that big box of bags from my cupboard and started counting.

"Oh! I didn't remember I had this bag. It's beautiful. Oh and this one too."

Pulling out a lime green tote bag, I squealed,"This one will be perfect for summer!" It feels like I've found a chest of treasure. Ha.

MY BAGS

Sling bags

Wrist pouches

Shoulder/tote bags

Pouches/makeup cases

Clutch/party bags

Foldable bags

Hand(held) bags

Waist pouch

Backpacks

TOTAL

Shocking? Wait till you hear about the next part...

Then I went on to count the number of shoes I have.

MY FOOTWEAR

Flip flops

Sneakers/trainers/sports

Boots

Flat pumps

Lower pumps (nicer, smarter)

Heels

Open toe slips

Sandals

TOTAL

Just as shocking! I picked out 4 pairs of shoes that I'm gonna recycle. So that leaves with 47. Hmm...

Remember... A girl can never have too many of bags and shoes. And accessories! And clothes too! Think I'm very relaxed now. I'll leave the clothes and accessories till next time.

Clearing up my mess

2009-02-18T17:08:00.004Z

Okay... Here goes my first blog of the year.

I've not been blogging for ages and it's not hard to tell either. Haha. I should really get back into this now that I've settled into my new adobe and even managed to get my own broadband installed. So there, no more excuses of not blogging!

Having a messy environment makes one feels messy, for me at least. So to start it off, during lunch at work I started to clear away the jumble on my desk. I recycled old copies of newspapers and print out. Also put away a whole stack of free weekly shortlist magazines. They've been longing for my fingers to flip through their pages and I shall within the privacy of my own bedroom!

With my office mess more or less curbed, my bedroom is next on the list. Looks like I've found my mission tonight.

Mess today, gone tomorrow!

Information architecture

2008-11-20T22:58:00.004Z

I was having an enjoyable chat with Laura earlier on in the evening about this new internal website project that I am currently involved with at work (which is rather a refreshing change from the normal work bore). And also how I would be keeping notes of most of the things I do day-to-day, like which movies did I catch, whom I met up with or will be meeting, and (recently) my room hunting viewings, oyster card expiry dates, etc. in my schedule. Yes I'm old fashion rather than keep a plam top or blackberry. I'm doing the planet good by recycling paper (that made my scheduler) and reducing my carbon footprint from charging my devices. Excuses! Yeah yeah. whatever.

I must say she was rather impressed at how organised I am with all my planning and jotting. Well, of course I beg to differ but a nice compliment every now and then does feel good. *smirks* She said I'm exceptional as she pointed out not everyone keeps track of their daily lives like this. I'm a perfectionist I have to admit, it's a diease I can't kill. Everything has to be pefect or at least in order otherwise I could end up being in some kinda weird cranky mood if they don't go my way. Oh yes, you don't wanna go that way with me. You don't know me! Guess that's partly why I'm mostly miserable and greatly depressed of late with so many issues going on in live for me. I've been knocked off my chair and it's been really hard trying to get back on as it wasn't on my agenda. Hopefully after sorting out my current lodging suitation - which somehow had quite a twist of lemon added in from the landlord which I shan't go into - I'll be able to get on track and start being the perfectionist I am again. Back on the chair. I would require alot of money to sort this out I foresee. (Not bribery you silly)

Well as I was saying, I was having my enjoyable chat with Laura, yah dah yah dah dah, she suggested that I should move on and try specialising in a specific field in my line of job as she can tell that I really have fun and enjoy doing these bits of (website) organising and planning stuff. And presto - Information Architeture - that's what I should go into. She also said that I'm not using my (many) hidden talents at all and since this is a fairly new field in the industry and on demand for it will be a good milestone. I think I could look into that next year! Something to add to my resolution perhaps? Apart from trying to learn french of course which just got thrown out of the window after a few months' of lessons. Shame on me! And I barely remember how to speak it now.

Oh well, guess going down the information architecture line does sound visible and a good challenge. It's time I know what I wanna do in my line of job! And even get to enjoy it (hopefully). This will definately be on my agenda. You better watch out! You better not cry! 'Cause I'm telling you why! Information architeture is coming to town!

So what is Information Architecture?
As wikipedia would say:
Information architecture (IA) is the art of expressing a model or concept of information used in activities that require explicit details of complex systems. Among these activities are library systems, Content Management Systems, web development, user interactions, database development, programming, technical writing, enterprise architecture, and critical system software design. Information architecture has somewhat different meanings in these different branches of IS or IT architecture. Most definitions have common qualities: a structural design of shared environments, methods of organizing and labeling websites, intranets, and online communities, and ways of bringing the principles of design and architecture to the digital landscape.

Sounds cool? Here's more if you're keen to read on.
http://www.skillset.org/interactive/careers/profiles/article_4749_1.asp

Definately something I'll try to look into next year (once my lodging hoo haa is sorted). Wish me luck folks!

All is not lost!

2008-11-04T00:58:00.002Z

ALL IS NOT LOST!

PHEW!

Terrible things

2008-11-03T18:19:00.006Z

[18:17] Pea: i wanna shake the world at its neck
[18:17] Pea: *shake shake shake*
[18:17] Potatoe: world got no neck
[18:17] Potatoe: its round
[18:18] Pea: that's why i can't even do that
[18:18] Potatoe: u gotta kick his balls
[18:18] Pea: haa
[18:18] Pea: if i kick the balls will it work better?
[18:18] Potatoe: maybe it will say ouch haha
[18:19] Pea: just ouch
[18:20] Pea: ok i will kick it a couple of times.
[18:20] Pea: make it shout a few ouches
[18:20] Potatoe: maybe it will be blue black
[18:20] Pea: but.. isn't the world supposed to be a SHE?
[18:20] Potatoe: erm the one i know of is a he
[18:20] Potatoe: maybe the one u know is a she
[18:21] Potatoe: she has a tough life, needs to make babies
[18:21] Pea: lol
[18:22] P0tatoe: he just sleeps around easy life
[18:23] Pea: sucker!

One of my many enjoyable msn conversations with my beloved potatoe.

This year my emotional state is like a roller coaster and poor Dan has to endure the "fun" and "thrills" of it. I get terrible and extreme mood swings. Things haven't been going well lately - work; coping with financial suitation; house rental/hunting issues - twice within a year; being ill again right after recovering from one; etc. I'll just mention one for now. It may seem minor to you but it means the world to me (on top of everything else that's been happening) - for now at least. (It might go away after a night's sleep)

Just when I've decided to brace myself for the new challenges to face, trying to induce myself with positiveness outlook, I got crumbled. Negativeness hits.

I had been so preoccupied that I'd actually forgotten to renew my web hosting and domain name services. They expire on 2nd November of every year (if I keep to the same provider that is) and it slipped my mind to renew it which I only just did. Hopefully my website/files (which I haven't backed up the latest copy) will be retrievable once my payment has been approved.

It seems 2008 doesn't feel like a very good year though the number "2008" looks nice. How deceiving. May 2009 be better.

I have to try inject some anti-negativeness into me!

*shake shake shakes the world at its neck (even if it doesn't have any)*

Movember

2008-10-29T23:49:00.002Z

Here's my movember badge (for making a small donation) in support of Dan growing a mo for November.

What is Movember?

Movember (the month formerly known as November) is a charity event held during November each year.

At the start of Movember guys register with a clean shaven face. The Movember participants known as Mo Bros then have the remainder of the month to grow and groom their moustache and along the way raise as much money and awareness about male health issues as possible.

If you'd like to donate to show some support you can vist the mo site now and start donating via credit card or pay pal. Remember a little goes a long way.

https://www.movember.com/uk/donate/donate-details.php?action=sponsorlink&rego=1456376&country=uk

Resolutions

2008-09-23T15:23:00.000+01:00

Why wait for new year to set our resolutions?

I'm gonna set myself 5 resolutions now!

1] sleep earlier
2] spend when only necessary
3] start saving
4] eat more healthly
5] get into (bikram) yoga

Easy they may seem but it takes alot of effort and determination! Wish me the best of luck folks!

10 questions to ask men

2008-09-05T11:58:00.003+01:00

Well well well.. the past couple of months had been quite a whirlwind. Lotsa ups and downs, ups and downs. Ups and downs. Very tiring. Amidst the gloomy times, there's still the occassional beams of sunlight shinning through. All is not lost yet though I am kinda very much homesick. It's not fair that I get to have so much fun here without my lovely friends back home to share those moments with. Sigh. But I'll be going home soon! Yay! Though only for a short week, it'll be worth it! If only I could be home for a bit longer.

Lovely view of the summer sky in my London neighbourhood

I now have new flatmates and they are wonderful and lovely people! It's been really enjoyable and much more a home now with them. We have so much fun together. We cook together, we joke together, we help give each other fashion tips together, we watch dvds together, we invite friends over and have a good laughter over a nice home cooked meal together. "We have to do this more often!" We kept repeating to one another. Just tonight we invited a friend over, all girls night of food and fun. I made us some oven baked chicken that had been marinated with soya sauce and oyster sauce. Samina made a lovely sweet potato and spinach curry which we all loved and couldn't get enough of. Franziska made some german speciality from potates which was just as yummy. Went well with the chicken which was mmm mmmm mmm... And there was rice with veggies too. As for dessert we had chocolate moose with ice cream and amaretto. Sweet. Oh no... You can never go without a dessert after a great meal. Not when you're with us!

Not sure if it was the food or the alcohol (we had some rosé and red wine too), but we decided to come up with 10 questions to ask men in the middle of our convesations. We were laughing while thinking up the questions or rather answers and at the same time trying to concentrate on our devouring our meals. Yes, I admit, we are rather ambitious women.

So here goes. Listen up you men out there, it's time to answer some 10 questions now! (Dan, you too. Lol)

10 questions to ask men

Q1 When you see boobs what do you think of?
1] milk
2] melons
3] support and comfort
4] sexual pleasures

Q2 When you are running, what do you feel in your lower region?
1] tennis balls
2] cotton balls
3] swinging sensation
4] squashing

Q3 Does underwear matter?
1] Bridget Jones (granny pants)
2] nothing is best, less is more
3] body suit
4] ann summers

Q4 If you really like someone how soon would you contact her?
1] immediately
2] after 1 day
3] after 5 days
4] after a month

Q5 How old do you think you'll need to be to get married?
1] early 20s because the first one for life
2] 30s, had all the fun and can do without it
3] age doesn't matter, just when it feels right
4] commitment, what is commitment?

Q6 What boobs size do you like?
1] a pinch
2] a handful
3] 2 footballs and I'm happy
4] I like suffocation

Q7 What do you like your girl to taste like?
1] burger
2] beer
3] cherry
4] chocolate

Q8 What would be the most romantic moment?
1] fish and chips and a pint
2] going to a football match together
3] a box of chocolates and a bunch of roses
4] watching the sunrise together

Q9 How intelligent does she need to be?
1] blonde bimbo in a pink track suit
2] in an apron (motherly)
3] like to look through her smudgy glasses in a dusty library
4] up the ladder (power bitch)

Q10 Fu*k these questions...
1] I just want to get laid
2] I just want to get laid and see how goes
3] I just like her
4] I just love her for the way she is

Current state of mind

2008-06-18T01:11:00.002+01:00

I'm feeling very fragile at the moment. My heart is frail. I can't breathe and I might just break down any second. I feel like running away again. Crying non-stop for a period of time doesn't seem to pacify that feeling anymore. I need something else. I need a break - to run off into the wind. Whispering into the wind my worries and let it be carried away into the far distant, let it run away with the wind instead.

Tears of Joy

2008-06-13T23:34:00.005+01:00

Norah Jone's "Don't know why" is playing in the background. I like having her music to chill out to. I'm in a mellow mood now. Calm. Smiling to the soothing music (only to be ending up sobbing later on down the blog as I blogged). The past month or so had been quite a nightmare, I had a load on my mind and they still are. Things have been rather too much to bear. I feel worn out. However I'm trying to relax and assure myself that everything will be alright if I take it a step at a time. I can be brave and strong again if I really try hard enough. Where has the old Angela gone to? I need her back!

Earlier on I stayed back late at work, not to do over time on a Friday night but instead to chat with my veggie friends, Potatoe (Trixy), Mushroom (Joy) and Aubergine (Adeline). Unfortunately Winter Melon (Syndy) couldn't be present. Oh man, how much I've missed the girls! And it's been ages since we last had a group chat like this online together. We're all over the world now. It was really great catching up and listening to each others lives and sharing experiences like how we would normally do at our many past gatherings. Guess internet's the best cyber hangout place for now. Till we all meet again to be able to see each other smile and laughing together, I'll be waiting, looking forward to that one day. I miss my good old veggie babes. Definately. Absolutely. Yes. It makes me sad not being able to hang out with them.

Last night I was looking at photos from Joy's trip with her boyfriend and his family in Orlando. They looked happy. She looking so happy just brought tears of Joy (pun intended) to my eyes. I'm so happy for her and yet so sad because it suddenly brought back fond memories of those happy times we had hanging out together since our polytechnic days to when we last met up back home. Oh my, and it just dawn upon me that it's exactly a decade this July that we've known each other. How time flies. How mocking life can be. I'm glad we are still in contact with one another though being thousand of miles apart.

Perhaps I'm the sort of emotional type. Getting worked up easily. I had a chat with Joy on skype while I was walking to Boots at Piccadilly Circus to get some eye gel after getting off work. The moment I heard Joy's voice, I couldn't keep it within me and I started crying softly whilst dodging people's gazes on the street. I kept repeating in mandarin "I miss you so much!" while trying to hold back my tears. It's great to be hearing her voice again and to be chatting and be myself again (when with her).

I don't know why but I'd been feeling rather homesick lately. Guess it must be the stress, and not being able to have my close friends with me in times of my need to have their ears and shoulders to borrow for comfort depresses me even more. It's not easy being a foreigner. I supposed.

I've caught it...

2008-06-01T23:41:00.003+01:00

After staying home and watching on my laptop two animation movies - Hoodwinked, Meet the Robinsons - I begun flipping through various older journal entries over the past three years of my stay in the UK. Main ingredient of all the or rather most of the entries taste of lonliness. Time flies, I have changed. From someone who was ever so cheerful, bubbly and carefree to someone lonely, depressed, moody and very insecured. The cheery self now is fake. I wonder if that's what London is capable of. Turning innocent, naive individuals to such state. Or is it the real world that's the actual culprit? Have I been too protected back in SG? Or is it all part and parcel of growing up? But I've always been 12!

All the recent series of events - work, life, love - has drained me. I feel really tired, strained, numbed. I don't feel a thing anymore. It's like being tied down and having lotsa pins stuck into your flesh, but you don't feel a thing, you can't feel the pain. That numb. I no longer know how it is like to feel again. I don't know what emotions do I go through each day. Could this be depression taking in? I somehow won't be surprised if it is. I suspect that I've caught it...

Fake left-hander

2008-01-31T14:40:00.000Z

When I get bored at work or when I'm starting to fall asleep before my screen. What I tend to do would be - to take a pen, grab some paper and start writing with my left hand (I'm a right-hander by the way). I'd be listening to a song, catching the lyrics and trying to write as much as I can grasp with my left hand. It's rather a good idea to keeping awake and myself amused.

Now, why don't you try that too! Try writing with your other hand.

Come that feeling again...

2008-01-30T23:42:00.000Z

Having someone there to share one's time with; having someone there to have fun together with; having someone there to be told how special one is. Having that someone. Someone I never imagined I can be so fotunate to have.

It's almost like a dream. So afraid to wake up, for it may just disappear. There I go again. My fear of waking up and losing it all. My fear of being able to be happy for fear of losing it. Do I enjoy making others happy - seeing them happy on the expense of my own misery?

I'm such a child. Living in the fear of getting hurt again if falling deeper in. Sometimes ending up saying things that may hurt but not with the intention to harm but to protect.

Operation Lily Pad - IKEA

2008-01-29T11:50:00.000Z

Code name: Operation Lily Pad
Location: Ikea, Croydon UK
Mission: To capture The Frog "MATA 4-piece eating set"
Status: Accomplished

Decided to head to IKEA to get the baby feeding set to top on to this other bath time toy I'd gotten for Michelle's adorable son's first b'day party this coming Saturday (but his actual b'day is on 1st Jan). It's either tonight or I'll never get my arse to IKEA due to my constant procrastination habits. I'm glad I did and my mission was a success. Next mission would be to get the b'day card.

The weekend

2008-01-28T13:21:00.000Z

It was Dan's b'day last Friday. We decided to spend the weekend together instead so he can have a good night out - hard rocking - with his friends on Friday (the music's not really my cuppa tea). On Saturday we went to Taro - a really neat japanese restaurant which has the best jap rice I ever had in London - before heading for clubbing to Laurent Garnier at The End. At Taro, we had some hot sake, which I rather am fine with. It taste milder when warm as compared to when its cold. It feels a little like vodka but taste sweeter. Unfortunately Dan didn't really like it, so the whole bottle was mine! *evil grins*

I was so looking forward to Laurent Garnier spinning and a great night of dancing which was fun until it got too hot from the dancing in the club that we had to take a break. There should be a law in UK that all clubs have good air conditioning in them. Tsk tsk... The music turned rather relaxing trance-like (I prefer it when it was much harder trance or whatever you call it) later into the night. It was a good thing we decided to call it a night at 3am and went home.

Sunday was spent rather lazily. We didn't get up until late. We're like 2 lazy cats. Dan's lucky that the other lazy one - me that is - is cooking for the hungry cats. For lunch I quickly whipped up some pasta and salad. And for dinner, it was a great success. I made beef + pork + coriander meat balls with slight tinge of teriyaki sauce; stir fry bean sprouts + tomato + spring onions; steam salmon in chinese rice wine + ginger + mushroom; rice. Yummy, there's enough left overs to last me for the next 2 - 3 nights. Gee...

We watched some DVDs too - attempt to "force" Dan to watch High School Musical was unsucessful. First DVD watched was Seven Swords. The fighting scenes were so cool! I won't mind watching it again! Dan fell asleep for half of the movie - guess he must be really tired. Imagine 3 late nights out (drinking/dancing) in a row who wouldn't be exhausted. Next was Appleseed, I've seen this animation movie before, it has really cool battle scenes along with the music. Then it was my turn to become sleepy and nearly fallen asleep towards the end of the movie. I started blabbering and became whiny and needed sleep. So that marks the end of our chilled out weekend.

Wolfmother

2008-01-24T11:27:00.000Z

I guess it's been some time since I last bought an album. About time! Once I get paid, this would be the album I be getting.

Listen to the samples

I first got to know Wolfmother last year when I went to a music festival - Isle of Wight festival 2007. Here's a quick run through: It was my first Music Festival camping experience (apart from a Dance Valley Festival in Holland back in 2006). This one was well nice but pity I was on my own most of the times. I couldn't understand what Amy Winehouse was singing - must be too drunk and mumbling instead of singing - but her voice was power! Woo hoo! And Kasabian was great too! Must say that Muse had the best crowd and visual/lighting effects! I was standing amongst the lively crowd, singing and waving with them. Way awesome! Hell of an experience.

Wolfmother is a Grammy Award winning Austrailian hard rock band from Sydney, New South Wales. Though heavy metal, hard rock may not be my taste to music but there are exceptions of course. Wolfmother is definately one of the few. Their music still has a nice rhythm and melody to it. It's not just all about screaming and metal, really nice guitar too.

Spot the difference? Tsk tsk...

a box of dark truffles

2008-01-22T13:42:00.000Z

YIPPY!

I found this box of dark truffles tucked away in my drawers at work.

But here's the catch - expiry date 01 Dec 2007

GREED overcame me.

I popped one into my mouth, still taste fine. However after a few seconds...

GEE... I think I start feeling hyper!

I feel like jumping about, okay, I'm exaggerating. But my heart sure feels like it's racing!

OKAY! That's it! I'm throwing those dark truffles away!

Just not ready for work

2008-01-22T13:18:00.000Z

Woke up this morning, bad hair day, but that's always the case when I wash my hair the night before. Think I've grown too attached to my hair straighteners. Bad.

I couldn't find my pink sneakers...
when they should be on the shoe rack or shoe cupboard.

I couldn't find my fav metal watch...
when it should be sitting on the shelves.

I couldn't find my keys...
when they should have been in my bag for work.

I couldn't find my coupons...
when they should be somewhere on the shelves.

One stop away on the tube. I finally remembered I had my keys by the kitchen back door and I hadn't lock it! Blimey, I had to take a detour back. Thank goodness all was fine when I got home. Rushing about in the morning isn't nice. I'll have to look for my other stuffs when I'm home.

I think the stock market is facing bigger problems than mine today.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/business/7201812.stm

needs

2008-01-21T16:58:00.000Z

I NEED to get to a beach!
I NEED to get my feet onto a snowboard!
I NEED to get roller blading again!

I NEED that sensation of the freedom of the wind blowing into my face as:

I sit by the waves;
I board on the snow;
I blade past the crowd;

A moody phase then and again

2008-01-11T23:33:00.000Z

I think I'm a rather insecure person when it comes to many things, even when in a relationship. If I'm not getting enough attention my mind may begin to start wandering into thinking. I try to block the negative feelings out. Somehow in order to do that I would turn moody, into a I-just-wanna-be-left-alone mode for no reason; start letting that loneliness feeling take over and gain control.

Is this how it's supposed to be? I think it's rather unhealthy but I'm not really sure what should I do. It's been some time since this feeling took over this way, or perhaps not.

It'll be nice to be sitting by the window with a mug of hot drink, hot choco maybe in this instance, sipping while looking out at the stars shinning in the sky. Or perhaps sitting by a cafe window, reading a nice book while enjoying the hot drink. Sad yet soothing music playing in the background.

Dream hairstyles

2008-01-10T14:52:00.000Z

Here's a quick preview to my current hairstyle.

- front view -

My stoopid smile.
Not quite sure I like the front view of my hairstyle.

- side view [right] -

I like the sides better. Choppy layers.

- side view [left] -

I like how the fringe flow to the sides.

And here're 2 hairstyles that I like.

- hairstyle #1 -

I'm trying to grow my hair long and hopefully to be able to get a similiar cut like this.
One that's just as funky and will look good on me.

- hairstyle #2 -

I really liked how this girl here is able to carry off this funky style, she's so cool!
Or rather the hairstyle is so cool!
This may not suit me. I have a rather long face.

The New Year

2008-01-06T11:52:00.000Z

The sky's clear blue out of my window. The leaves that used to block the lovely view of the sky had gone to visit the ground (month before). All left were but bare tree branches. Winter can still be beautiful. I'm smiling. I feel relax. The sun is shinning and that makes my heart beams. Noon.

It's nice to finally have a quiet time to myself. I've spent most of my December away. I've been rushing about like crazy meeting friends during my 3 weeks holiday (December 2007) back home (in Singapore). It's a pity that time is always never enough when you're having so much fun hanging out with them. I had mixed emotions when I left the airport this New Year's day to fly back to London again. In a way I wished I could stay in Singapore but yet in another unknown way I know my time in London's not up yet. Lord knows how long before I get to settle down back home. I think my dad is definately looking forward to that day. He misses me I could tell. I remembered him telling me "You must send me emails (you've stopped doing it)!"

I never really had breakfast with my folks before. Gosh, I don't even know if we ever had one together before! It was nice to have breakfast together (at the airport). It was brief as I had to catch my flight but it was nice (if only we could do that more).

I waved goodbye to them after I passed through the gate.

I waved goodbye to them after I got my passport checked.

I waved goodbye to them after I walked past the passport check point.

I waved goodbye to them one last time as I disappeared into the bustling departure hall.

Waving away the year 2007 that's past and waving to the new 2008. But never waving away family and friends dear to me back home.

Look Ma! I'm on a Magazine cover!

2007-11-28T15:45:00.000Z

Create Fake Magazine Covers with your own picture at MagMyPic.com

Subscribe to People Magazine at a 37% discount!

November thoughts

2007-11-01T10:52:00.000Z

I realised that it's finally autumn as I caught a glimpse of the first tree turning orange this morning. It's been 3 monthish since I've moved. My old neighbourhood is always surrounded by bountiful greenery as compared to my current address. Journey to work via the underground (in new area) does not allow me the privilege of any scenery. Then the remaining journey to the office offers no help to any greenery either. No wonder it didn't dawn upon me that autumn is already knocking on my door. It's been rather cold this October, at least I won't be around this cold X'mas. Can't wait to be back home to chill in the hot Summer.

It's amazing how fast time flies and barely 6 weeks more I'm to fly home again to be reunited with family and friends. I'm looking forward to the day but I can't say I'm prepared to yet. There're still so much to sort out back in the UK - work, "freelance", financial suitation and pressies to buy! Packing too! I feel so messy and disorganised. Sigh. There's just not enough time for me to idle and laze about!

my equation

2007-10-15T23:52:00.000+01:00

I guess it's been quite a while yeah? A lot has happened, I'm still the same old same old. A girl waiting for her prince in the fancy little world of her own. I seriously do not know what's wrong with me! Why am I so protective of myself - on one hand closing up and not wanting to get hurt and yet on the other hand getting my heart broken by all the wrong choices of men. I seriously do not understand myself. Even though I've told myself not to run away, and there I go sprinting off. I'm really tired and it really has taken a toll on life and work which is no good at all. Totally not a good sign. But I do not know how to stop this and get myself out of it. I've sunk so deep in that it's become part of me. To be living without it is like losing a part of me. Sigh. Terrible. If possible I wanna take a time off and go blading by the coast back home again; sitting by the beach and have all the time in the world to think about things and myself. But would I really have such a time? I'm always busy running about like a mad woman.

I tried but I failed. I do not know how to communitcate. I seriously have to forget about POF totally. Would a guy not want to be in contact with a girl he could grow to fancy and know? My equation for knowing if the guy can be someone potential may have been proven wrongly here then.

POTENTIAL GUY = HAPPY + COMFORTABLE (when together with)

That's my equation. I must say I just realised there's more to the equation than it seems. This equation is true if you want to know if a particular guy can be someone potential. But here's when the extra bit comes into the whole equation.

AFFIRMATIVE POTENTIAL GUY = HAPPY + COMFORTABLE (when together with) X 2 WAY TRAFFIC

It takes two hands to clap. Why haven't I remembered! So what if I'm really feeling happy and comfortable and able to be myself with POF? I've tried clapping but he's not voluntarily returning the clap. That's when it is time to let go! Past experiences have taught me to try learn taking it easy 'cause there's really no point getting all upset about. And I didn't even cry over it - tears won't flow out. I'm just numbed. Amazing. But still it had been a great time and lovely memory. 不在乎天长地久,只在乎曾经拥有.对吗?

I think I'm more upset over the fact that I can't find my CDs of photos of the last few years!!!!! All my photos with close friends and family and travels!!!!! Triple sigh. Now that's what I call depressing, more upsetting and heart breaking to think about rather than over some guy. Sigh.

Left or right?

2007-10-01T16:21:00.001+01:00

Look at the below image for a minute or 2.
Is she turning clockwise or anticlockwise?

For me, at first glance it was clockwise, then after a minute or more, it began to turn anticlockwise. Then after a moment it's back to clockwise again. Woah, I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me. But after a period of time, it seems to set turning in the same clockwise direction. But if I were to try concentrate really really really hard I think I can try make it turn anticlockwise. Weird.

Well... An ex-colleague shared this test with me. However the test result is in portuguese. He said he only sees it turning clockwise-anticolckwise-clockwise and had been clockwise ever since, whereas his girlfriend sees it turning antoclockwise only. I tested this out on 2 other colleagues. Both have different results. One sees it turning clockwise only and the other anticlockwise only. Guess it's cool for one to be able to see it turn for both directions.

So what direction is it for you? Post it in my comments! I would love to know.

- TEST RESULT -

PORTUGUESE VERSION
"Supostamente, se você estiver estimulando mais o lado racional do cérebro (o esquerdo) você verá a mulher girando no sentido anti-horário. Caso esteja utilizando mais o lado direito do cérebro, ligado a subjetividade, ela gira no sentido horário."

TRANSLATED VERSION (from dictionary.com)
Supposedly, if you will be stimulating more the rational side of the brain (the left) you you will see the woman turning in the counter-clockwise direction. In case that it is using more the right side of the brain, on the subjectivity, it turns in the clockwise one.

MY TRANLATION FROM ABOVE
Suppose if you see the woman turning anti-clockwise, it stimulates your rational side of the brain (left brain). And if you see it turning clockwise, for most people would, you are using more of the right side of the brain.

Test your brain and see how much of a left or right side person are you. For me I'm very balanced, 46% left, 46% right - perhaps that's why I always have the problem of contradicting myself.
http://similarminds.com/brain.html

LEFT BRAIN FUNCTIONS
uses logic
detail oriented
facts rule
words and language
present and past
math and science
can comprehend
knowing
acknowledges
order/pattern perception
knows object name
reality based
forms strategies
practical
safe

RIGHT BRAIN FUNCTIONS
uses feeling
"big picture" oriented
imagination rules
symbols and images
present and future
philosophy & religion
can "get it" (i.e. meaning)
believes
appreciates
spatial perception
knows object function
fantasy based
presents possibilities
impetuous
risk taking

Left and Right brain functions source:
http://www.viewzone.com/bicam.html
- go read or find out more!

giving up

2007-09-25T13:52:00.000+01:00

I hate to think that giving up is the better option out!

I do not like to give in to giving up!

lost interest in...

2007-09-24T14:03:00.000+01:00

I was briefly catching up with an ex-colleague online. One topic led to another. From him sharing a flat with his girlfriend to his sister giving birth soon to children to relationships.

And so part of the conversation went on like this...

Dan: so on that matter are you still single??
Pea: yep still am and I believe will still be for quite a long while
Dan: that's no good, so haven't met anyone lately then?
Pea: I just got to know a guy but don't think he seems very interested
Dan: that's no good
Pea: this year I got to know a few others but I'm just not interested. I can't seem to bring myself to want to get involve with any guy
Dan: Ang, are you sounding like a possible lesbian... lol
Pea: haha and I'm not interested in women either
Dan: well that's no good... lol... you need something just don't know what
Pea: I need to go to a beach!
Dan: well you'll be going home for your break, so you can show your body off in a bikini at the beach
Pea: yeah I suppose you're right. I don't know what's it I need yet hence why the no interest for now

Guess I'll know when the time is ripe then. I'm still waiting on my vine to ripe. Or you can say the right guy's not come by to sweep me off my feet yet. He'll need a very BIG broom then. hahahaa....

3 years plan

2007-09-17T23:05:00.000+01:00

Woo Hoo!!!

I finally received my UK driving license today in the post! (Psst, however my UK license start date is just a day difference from my SG start date, drats, would have been perfect if both had the same date!)

Yippy, now it's time to aim for a car! But first I'll have to clear my debts and spend less and save up for the car!

Well my 3 year plan for now is very simple, just 3 things on the list for now:
1] to own a car in London
2] to be able to speak french fluently (well... at this rate I'm going...)
3] to be able to buy my own property in London

*smirks* Let's all wait and see then. 3 years!

Well I know that last point seems very highly impossible, SO I'm listing this as backup (which shouldn't be too hard):

3] to be able to know how to snowboard!

I'm not being materialistic mind ya. Why I'm aiming for these is because:

1] I want to have my own car to be able to drive to IKEA to buy stuffs that would need the help of a car to bring home. To drive about as and when I like over the weekends mainly. I can drive to the beach. I can make short road trips. It's like a freedom!

2] I took up french because my Switzerland trip early this year motivated me so. I wanted to pick up snowboarding but took up french first so if I were to go to France or Switzerland again I can speak to the people in french. Silly but true.

3] I want a place I can call home in London! No more worrying if I can make holes in the walls just so I can hang mirrors or put up pictures! I can decorate the place however I want it to! This can be considered as a kinda investment too!

and of course:

3] I'll never be able to get a change at snowboarding when I'm back in sunny Singapore, summer all year round. Need I explain more?

Silly things a girl will do for the sun...

2007-09-17T22:52:00.000+01:00

What do you know. That girl is me.

London being London and such, for it to have a sunny summer-like weekend is quite a rare sight indeed here in the September months. Not wanting to admit that Summer has abandoned us, I decided to challenge the Sunny Sunday afternoon to give me my well deserved tan! So silly me sat in the back garden clad in a tube dress trying to get my tan. Unfortunately Cold Autumn Wind decided to pay Warm Summer Sun a visit. Both cold and hot under the open sky for an hour ended up with me having the Cold Flu as a guest now.

One of the many silly things I do. I wonder what next...

Annoyance

2007-09-04T15:01:00.000+01:00

I'm trying to keep cool and calm myself down; composing myself to look at things positively and telling myself I can do it!

Work is just getting annoying with different people attacking me from both sides, wanting this and that done along side with the tight deadlines juggling in my hands. Is this how it is like out there for everyone else too? Annoying isn't it. I want to get work done but it's simply so hard to concentrate if they keep attacking you. I think I need to come up with a strategy to better cope with this.

First, I'll have to get proper amount of sleep each night! Second, stop working over time and go home and stop thinking about work at home and rest and concentrate on my french homework and other tasks out of work. Third, always keep my cool and try not to get side track by every request! Tsk tsk...

WAR (violence) is NOT the answer

2007-08-31T18:01:00.000+01:00

Today I received this email which I thought will be good to share with all.

What you are reflects the way you were brought up, therefore Parents and the environment.

Dr. Arun Gandhi, grandson of Mahatma Gandhi and founder of the M.K.Gandhi Institute for Non-violence, in his June 9 lecture at the University of Puerto Rico, shared the following story:

I was 16 years old and living with my parents at the institute my grandfather had founded 18 miles outside of Durban, South Africa, in the middle of the sugar plantations. We were deep in the country and had no neighbours, so my two sisters and I would always look forward to going to town to visit friends or go to the movies.

One day, my father asked me to drive him to town for an all-day conference, and I jumped at the chance. Since I was going to town, my mother gave me a list of groceries she needed and, since I had all day in town, my father asked me to take care of several pending chores, such as getting the car serviced. When I dropped my father off that morning, he said, 'I will meet you here at 5:00 p.m., and we will go home together.'

After hurriedly completing my chores, I went straight to the nearest movie theatre. I got so engrossed in a John Wayne double-feature that I forgot the time. It was 5:30 before I remembered. By the time I ran to the garage and got the car and hurried to where my father was waiting for me, it was almost 6:00.

He anxiously asked me, 'Why were you late?'

I was so ashamed of telling him I was watching a John Wayne western movie that I said, 'The car wasn't ready, so I had to wait,' not realizing that he had already called the garage.

When he caught me in the lie, he said: 'There's something wrong in the way I brought you up that didn't give you the confidence to tell me the truth. In order to figure out where I went wrong with you, I'm going to walk home 18 miles and think about it.'

He dressed in his suit and dress shoes, he began to walk home in the dark on mostly unpaved, unlit roads.

I couldn't leave him, so for five-and-a-half hours I drove behind him, watching my father go through this agony for a stupid lie that I uttered. I decided then and there that I was never going to lie again.

I often think about that episode and wonder, if he had punished me the way we punish our children, whether I would have learned a lesson at all. I don't think so. I would have suffered the punishment and gone on doing the same thing. But this single non-violent action was so powerful that it is still as if it happened yesterday.

That is the power of non-violence.

Not gay

2007-08-29T23:57:00.000+01:00

I asked the Chestnut today if he was gay.

Chestnut looked at me in shock,"I'm not. Do I look gay to you? Why would you think I am gay?"

Okay, verdict - Chestnut is not gay.

Sometimes I wonder...

2007-08-23T00:21:00.000+01:00

Sometimes I wonder...

Why am I here?
What am I doing here for?
What do I want from here?
Why don't I just give up now?

Ain't got a clue yet... I carry on wondering...

Blessings in disguise - Part 2

2007-08-22T22:54:00.000+01:00

After waking up from a night of partying to a relaxing Sunday afternoon, I went straight to getting my mirror mounted onto the wall. It now fits nicely behind my shelf. I can see my reflection from the back of the see-through shelf. It's like my mini dressing table-shelf now. I like it!

Remembering I had a dinner invite from my ex-housemates, I got ready and off I went from the South back to the West for a nice rendez-vous at my previous address. It felt kinda surreal to be walking up the ever once so famaliar path. It's nice to be back in the big house with my friends.

We had lotsa food! I drank quite a fair amount of wine too. We even had joints. Tsk tsk...

It was getting late and I wanted to head home given the fact that that would take me an hour, I didn't want to miss my train but I ended up taking half hour just to say my goodbyes. By the time I got to the tube station it was near 11.30pm. Ah ah! This was when I realised... I've left my mobile back at the house! Drats! With haste I made my way back up the surreal path again. Man I must have missed this place! Within record time I was back at the tube station. I managed to get the next overground to Paddington station to change for another tube.

I guess I was too late as the last tube I'm supposed to change to had gone! I was forced to change my route. And by the time I got to my other destination to catch another tube, it had gone too! What luck! It was slightly past midnight and I started to panic as all possible tube route combinations back home had all gone and I didn't know what to do! I swore I nearly cried as I was lost and still stuck in the western bit of London. I was angry with myself for not being able to get myself home and stuffs. Haha, but after finally calming myself down, I tried to be positive and told myself to treat this as a little adventure. It can be rather fun in a way.

Good thing I had my mobile with me and even luckier I had internet on my phone so I can check how to get home online. Thank god I went back to get my phone! Blessing in disguise!

In the end I had to catch 3 different buses just to get home. Good thing Mushroom was online and we both chatted over the phone via skype and that made my journey much more enjoyably bearable though I was really tired. It was great hearing her voice again and chatting together! Another blessing in disguise! It wasn't until 1.30am that I finally got back home! 2 freaking hours! Lesson learnt now. The next time I ever visit my ex-housemates I'll make sure to say my goodbyes earlier. Haha...

Blessings in disguise - Part 1

2007-08-21T00:33:00.000+01:00

A quick (to my standards) run through of what a weekend I had part 1 - Saturday's

Ikea's website is like my oxygen, I cannot live without going to it everyday! I had been planning my room's furnishing for the past 3 weeks or more without fail - rain or shine, day or night - ever since I moved. And to think that I had actually wanted to wait for another week before actioning my well thought "interior design" plan. I made sure Ikea had all the stuffs that I wanted in stock with a little research the night before and I made a dash for them once I got to ikea on Saturday on my own. I repeat on my own. Again I repeat on my own. Okay, you've got it. Good. Because on my ikea shopping list I had:

1] 2 seater red sofa (180cm width)
2] bookcase (190cm height)
3] another slightly smaller bookcase (149cm height)
4] TV bench (145cm width)
5] side table that I use as my coffee table (55x55cm)
6] desk (120x60cm)
7] a chair
8] a folding chair
9] rug (195x135cm)
10] mirror (120x40cm)
11] boxes for storage
12] shelf for my wardrobe (100x58cm)

Please don't ask me how much I've spent, I'm still wondering how to repay my credit card's favour. Haha. Anyway, on my own I had to race about Ikea getting them from all over the warehouse. There were so many people. It was mad! Waiting in line at the information helpdesks to get locations for some of my stuffs. Man, shan't go into details of that, I can go on and on about it.

All but one item was what I needed to complete my purchase - the missing shelf for my wardrobe. Ah ha! What I can say is that the out of stock shelf was found on someone else's trolley which had been left alone for ages. There were 2 packages of them, and a guy was by it, so I thought to ask where had he managed to get them from so I could try find it. Then he asked me back if those were mine. I said no but that was what I was looking for, and what do you know, he too. Hahahaha... we are not stealing or nicking, we are just taking what's on our shopping list and putting it onto our own trolley. This is blessing in disguise #1. Blessing in disguise #2 was the red sofa cover for my sofa. I was told they had stock for it then no stock for it and then they had stock for it again. Gee and I queued up thrice for that! Glad I had enough paitence. Even more so true when I had to wait for an hour just so I could get my stuffs delivered home from this other delivery guy offering £5 cheaper delivery service as compared to Ikea's! If I wasn't so skint I wouldn't have had all this paitence.

Here's what I'd planed for my room (the 2nd stage)! The furnitures are not resized to scale. I didn't get the dinning table set in the end, just not worth it. Got another desk and other chairs instead. Thinking of returning the smaller bookcase as there's not much space in my room for it (I miscalculated). Will get the cushions the next time. As for the TV, I'm still saving up for it! Tsk tsk... but I'm loving my red sofa! (I'm sitting on it now as I'm blogging). Woo hoo! It's great to have your own room!

Bed fit for the KING

2007-07-25T14:03:00.000+01:00

Shit! I think I bought a king sized bed rather than the intended double (or Queen) sized bed. Could have spent the extra £ on some other furniture.

Damn it! I'm regretting it now! Imagine if I have to move a year later, it's terrible... WHY did I buy a KING sized one!

*CRIES*

July - the month of change

2007-07-15T19:58:00.000+01:00

It seems like July's the month for move. Why? I'll name you 4 for now...

- firstly -
Beginning of the month I found out that my fairy tale Prince whom I met in a "ball" in Paris has found his Cinderella in her glass slippers. It would have been truly a sweet fairy tale ending for him and I but snapping back to reality, I'm moving on.

- secondly -
I'm now finally able to treat the chestnut as a friend and hang out with again. The chestnut whom I had once so ever foolishly gone ga ga over and cried my heart out with. Thinking back now, I had been really naive and really really silly and very blind. Though it took me quite a while to put it behind, it's worth it. It's history and I learnt from it.

- thirdly -
Many changes are happening in my current job. We're moving to a new building, we'll have new seating arrangements (can't say that I favour where I've been assigned to sit), we have new team leaders as well as products/projects assigned to us for our primary and secondary roles (which I'm not very particularly happy about!!!).

- forthly -
I'll be moving to south London instead of west London which has been home to me the past 2 years that I've been in the UK. I'm sure gonna miss west London and its greenery badly. But... looking on the bright side! I'm gonna have my own room now! (Yep, I've been sharing a room for my whole life!) And plus point is I can decorate the unfurnished place I'm moving into! YAY! However, I ain't got much to spend. It's gonna take some time to do up my own room. I'm kinda looking forward to it nonetheless. It'll be good to live in and explore another part of London.

brown hair?

2007-07-01T16:13:00.000+01:00

I was looking into the mirror and noticed...

My hair used to be jet black, but under the sunlight it seems to be reflecting a brownish tinge.

I looked into my mirror again...

Without the sunlight shinning, it looks black again but not jet black. Somehow my hair has turned a shade or two lighter. I like it this way, I like it brown, dark brown is fine.

Switzerland

2007-04-12T22:22:00.000+01:00

Wanting to celebrate my birthday month in style, I decided to join my friend, Brian, in his Switzerland trip. It was a rather last minute thingy for me but I'm really glad I went along on the trip. It was so beautiful there and I fell in love with the snow mountains! And it made me very determind to learn snowboarding too (pity we didn't have the chance to get our feet on skiis and snowboards). I'm gonna sign myself up for French lessons first!

Anyway... we toured Switzerland together travelling about in first class trains, how cool is that! We managed to get the free upgrade from an online promotion. Lucky lucky.

Check Brian's blog out to find out more. He's got many more beautiful photos too!! (YES! I'm very lazy!):
1] I am back from Swiss! I am coughing badly now with...
(I didn't go to Bern, Brian went to Bern first and I met him later on in Geneva)
2] Many photos coming up! After Bern i went to Geneva...
3] The last post of my easter trip! The breathtaking ...

感触

2007-03-06T19:28:00.000Z

不久后我得再度与你们离别了。。。不到一周的时间我就得飞回英国继续工作了。不知何年才会回访新加坡永久定居叶。（我也不知该如何回答这不一定的未来。）但在新加坡度假这现有期间内，总觉得时间永远是不够的！我连去东海岸玩滑轮的时间都没有呀。

在此所逗留短期间内，我都是忙着与家人及朋友们见面交谈。同时也利用了我的度假来做视力激光矫正手术。忙得不可开交。还有很多事没办完，也还有些朋友们没见面到。哎。天阿！为什么时间总觉得不够吗。

所以我说呀，做人有时要自私一点儿，总得给自己单独的时间，停一下来找自我，办该完成的事物及回想看一看自己所经历的一切。可是时间哪会停留给我那么做吗！还是现实点吧你这个永远自我矛盾的女人！还是好好利用所限有的时间吧！

These are a few of the food I wanna eat back in SG

2007-02-20T15:59:00.000Z

- peng kang stingray
- nasi padang (includes beef rendang)
- bah chor mee
- rojak
- kway chup
- teochew porridge
- satay
- otak
- wanton mee
- bah ku teh
- satay bee hoon
- hainanese chicken rice
- prawn noodle
- chicken curry
- hokkien mee
- char kway teow
- fish soup
- yu tou mee fen
- curry fish head
- jian dao curry rice
- prawn mee
- pohphia
- roti prata
- kaya toast
- cai beng
- tian ji zhou

Dessert
- ice kachang
- chendol
- cheng teng
- gui ling gao
- bo bo char char
- nyor ya kway

Snow video

2007-02-10T23:35:00.000Z

My first ever snowing encounter abroad.
How I wish my friends were here to make snowman with me.
Trix, this vid is especially for ya!

Friends tell me it's spring
My window show the same
Without you here the seasons pass me by
I know you were not new
That loved like me and you
All the same I miss you
Today has been ok
Today has been ok

Singlish

2007-02-09T12:08:00.000Z

Woo hoo.. I can't wait to put my Singlish to use once more this coming Chinese New Year, when I fly home for my holiday! Whoopie!!!

Some Snow updates...

2007-02-08T10:41:00.000Z

10.30am, London, UK

I'm looking out of the window. It's not stopping since I woke at 7ish am this morning, the snowing of course. *Winks* Beautiful.

11am, London, UK

Yep, it's still snowing....

11.30am, London, UK

I believe that the snowing has ceased. Bummer.

1.30pm, London, UK

No more snowing! I wanted to go snow hunting in St James park but ended up eating Nasi Lemak in a restaurant in China Town area. Nasi lemak wasn't that bad. Tasted not as authentic, but still taste good otherwise. Tsk tsk...

It's actually snowing!

2007-02-08T09:49:00.000Z

10am, London, UK

OH MY GOD! It's actually snowing in London!

It has been for the past few hours since I awoke. I'm so happy! First in my lifetime to see it snow like there's no tomorrow! And lots of snow about (i.e. where I live; the city area is too hot for them to survive once touch down.)! It's still raining snow outside my office window! Hopefully by lunch time today the snow will still be around for I to get down to St. James Park to make me a snowman or even have snowfights with my colleagues if they want to tag along with this child - me i.e.

I was so excited that I even forgot to bring my packed lunch to work today. It's still sitting in the fridge back home. I was snapping photos away as I walked to the tube station. But it had been quite a chore getting to work with this snow "storm" affecting transportation.

Stay tune for more photos. Hopefully it shall include a snowman. Hee hee...

Let it snow let it snow let it snow...

2007-01-24T12:04:00.000Z

THAT ONE DAY...

Aaron Kwok

2007-01-24T10:05:00.000Z

I had a very weird dream this morning! Gee, I've never really like him but somehow he managed to sneak into my dream this morning.

Anyway cutting it brief, I dreamt that I was snuggled up close to Aaron Kwok under the warm blankets (and he was trying to kiss me!!). There we were, trying to fall asleep together. Hee, it felt like so nice - the feeling of just falling asleep together with him comfortably in his embrace, this feeling that none other guy has managed to give by far. However we were not alone! (Now... behave) On the other bed across the room was my grandfather sleeping in his bed! *faints*

Then it ended up we waking up to have breakfast in some sort of funny skyscraper building with apartments within. Blah blah blah...

Wonder what could this imply. Anyone can decode dreams?

Happy New Year!!!

2007-01-01T14:11:00.000Z

From long to shorter hair...
NEW cut NEW year NEW start
FRESH cut FRESH year FRESH start

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!!!
May 2007 be a NEW and FRESH year for all!!!

It's gonna be even BETTER!!!!

Last day of the year...

2006-12-31T10:29:00.001Z

It's finally a year coming soon to an end. 2006 has been quite a year for me with it's up and down. But it's been fun as well as sad. Anyway I'm looking forward to 2007. I'm sure it's gonna be an even better year than the previous. It's gonna be very exciting too! I'm going home for Chinese New Year (ANG BAOS!!) I'm gonna find out whether or not I'll be getting to stay on in the UK once the work permit/entrance clearance visa applications get through. Otherwise it's gonna be adjustments back home to SG. Travelling more hopefully (depending on my suitation).

So what's a new year without any new year's resolutions? Without further ado...

New Year Resolutions?
1] Try not to be so forgetful
2] Try save up more and spend less unnecessarily
3] Try catching up more with friends in SG
4] Try blogging more
5] Try eat less junk food!

[Trying to keep it minimal and achievable]

So ways to combat failing the resolutions?
1] Keep a To Do list whenever necessary, will use a journal specifically for this only
2] Not to go overboard spending especially when SALES are up every now and then, and aso keep to a financial budget
3] Make an effort to email/mail/msn them more (if I'm still gonna be in UK)
4] GET BROADBAND!
5] Control my diet and eat more greens & cook more greens

[Hopefully these would help]

7 days of Christmas

2006-12-31T10:29:00.000Z

~~12 days of Christmas~~ 7 days of Christmas

On the 1st day of Christmas,
I had Italian company at home and lovely Italian meal for dinner.

On the 2nd day of Christmas,
I baked lovely chocolate chips cookies for all at home and I ate many.

On the 3rd day of Christmas,
I went to Natural History Museum and walked about fascinated like a kid.

On the 4th day of Christmas,
I had a totally awesome haircut and we all liked it.

On the 5th day of Christmas,
I went shopping for pressies for myself and home and I went bonkers.

On the 6th day of Christmas,
I visited some friends and we had great times together.

On the 7th day of Christmas,
I and few DMD juniors in UK went countdown to the New Year by the River Thames and it's nice hanging out with SG company.

hair to a new begining

2006-12-12T17:48:00.000Z

Should I cut my long hair short? Though painstakingly I've tried my best to grow it as long as possible, with great effort.

I've had it for 3 years now. Perhaps it's time for a change? Cutting it short to signify a cut from the past and moving on? A new cut for a new start to the 2007?

moving on...

2006-12-04T22:38:00.000Z

Finally after months of cruel uncertainties, I manage to brace up the courage to end it. I believe it will take me quite a time before I can look him in the eye as friends again. It never will be a happy ending from the start. But there hasn't a begining to begin with. Things people foolishly fall into for being the innocent victim of loneliness. I'm glad I've decided to stop the prey from devouring me away. A fresh start for a fresh 2007 soon to come. Before that, Merry Christmas to me.

I MISS THE BEACH...

Going home

2006-11-06T23:55:00.000Z

I wonder how is it like to be walking along the streets in Singapore again. Having the once so familiar paths beneath my feet again, under the sunny hot sun. Looking at a vibrant night scene picture of the Singapore River with Boat Quay and Raffles Place in it, I must say it triggers something within me that tells me Singapore is waiting for me to be home again.

Come walk along all the familiar roads and
taste all the familiar air and happenings.

I wonder how does it feel like to be back home again. I shall embrace Singapore with warm open arms once more for a few week during my trip home in time to come. Soon. Paitence!

The cow got to visit...

2006-10-29T23:29:00.000Z

Places I ~~want to~~ showed the Cow, things ~~I want~~ the Cow to tasted/experienced :

Krispy Kream Donuts - the best donuts ever - ticked (best donut ever agreed)
Knightsbridge - eating Krispy Kream Donuts in Knightsbridge - ticked (best place with freshest made donuts)
Portobello Market - on a Saturday morning - ticked (shopaholics in action!)
Camden Town - look at another side of Britian - ticked (cow said Portobello was FAV!)
Piccadilly Circus/Leicester Square - the area where I work at - ticked
Stockpot - a place to order food from british menu - ticked (said nice food but a bit salty)
The Wishing Well - great 3 course meal for £7.95 - ticked (good ambience for long chats and catching up)
Oxford Circus/Bond Street - just like Orchard Road back home - 1/2 ticked (only a very small bit of Oxford circus)
Covent Garden - look at some buskers - ticked (3 times within the first day!?)
Tate Modern - my Fav museum. heard there's a slide there we must go try
Thames River - romantic stroll together? Haha... - ticked (beautifully romantic at night)
British Museum - Must see lovely glass roof?
Buckingham Palace - we'll walk from St James Park
London Eye - we'll just look at it go round round round - 1/2 ticked (lights were off as it was closed)
Spitalfield Market/Petticoat Lane Market/Brick Lane - The Arty Farty - ticked (Bought alot at Petticoat Lane)
Tower Bridge - And we'll hope on over to Big Ben and the Houses of Parliment - 1/2 ticked (Looked at it from out of Tower of London)
London Bus 15 - old style bus the London way
House Party - Housemates are having a Hen Party and Leaving Party for their colleagues - ticked ticked ticked! (Great fun *winks*)
English Breakfast - the Weatherspoon English Breakfast £1.99? - ticked (Best ENGLISH BREAKFAST ever!)
Introducing my housemates, colleagues and friends - when possible - ticked
Borough Market - ticked (went round sampling loads of food, ate alot and bought alot! FAV food market!)
H&M and PRIMARK - ticked (More shopping? Well, girls will still be girls!)

There's so much to see, so much to do, but such little time. - very ticked!

During the short span my friend, the Cow, had in London. I've tried my best to show her the best of London as much as I could. We walked like mad everyday!

And here's a montage of us in Rome, Italy. Rome was nice. Lovely weather (though super cold in the early wee hours and late wee hours), nice food, best gelato!!! The cow and I spent 4 days in Rome. We walked all day long till our feet hurts. We stuffed ourselves constantly with food and GELATOS! We snapped countless of photos! We tried out 2 different hostels too. And during our last night in Rome, we met an American born chinese lad in our hostel. It was his first ever backpacking trip out of LA to Italy for 9 days. That's pretty neat. Wish I had such courage to go backpacking on my own for a period of time in unfamiliar lands.

Bringing the cow to visit...

2006-10-11T22:55:00.000+01:00

2more days to go...

Places I want to show the Cow, things I want Cow to taste/experience :

Krispy Kream Donuts - the best donuts ever
Knightsbridge - eating Krispy Kream Donuts in Knightsbridge
Portobello Market - on a Saturday morning
Camden Town - look at another side of Britian
Piccadilly Circus/Leicester Square - the area where I work at
Stockpot - a place to order food from british menu
The Wishing Well - great 3 course meal for £7.95
Oxford Circus/Bond Street - just like Orchard Road back home
Covent Garden - look at some buskers
Tate Modern - my Fav museum. heard there's a slide there we must go try
Thames River - romantic stroll together? Haha...
British Museum - Must see lovely glass roof?
Buckingham Palace - we'll walk from St James Park
London Eye - we'll just look at it go round round round
Spitalfield Market/Petticoat Lane Market/Brick Lane - The Arty Farty
Tower Bridge - And we'll hope on over to Big Ben and the Houses of Parliment
London Bus 15 - old style bus the London way
House Party - Housemates are having a Hen Party and Leaving Party for their colleagues
English Breakfast - the Weatherspoon English Breakfast £1.99?
Introducing my housemates, colleagues and friends - when possible

There's so much to see, so much to do, but such little time.

The cow coming to visit

2006-10-08T12:52:00.000+01:00

Hee... Cow or moo moo cow. That's the nickname for one of my friends back home, whom is coming over to visit (coming friday) for a short holiday. Sad to say, we only have 3-4 days in London together as the rest of the holiday we'll be visiting Rome together. I'm really looking forward to it. I've been working like a mad Pea and she's been working like a mad Cow (not mad cow disease, mind ya). Just so we could have time for our holiday. But alas I'm sick right now. So pray hard that I'll be well again before she gets here. :) Erm.. but I've not booked our hostel yet. Tsk tsk.. perhaps we should be a little adventurous and just go find ourselves the hostel when we get there. Haha.. Life will be hell of an adventure. Here we come!

P.S. Thank god my auntie will not be coming with me to Rome. Positive confirmation! *smirks*

And so I borrowed my own shoulders

2006-10-04T21:34:00.000+01:00

The last time I remembered me crying my heart out, till my eyes were sore and my lungs tired, was on some cold November night, 2005. I was alone. In freezing Blackpool. It's nearly a year now, isn't it? This time I am (alone) too, but in London.

Maybe I am the kind to bottle things up and then explode once it's reached its limit? This time with no exception. That last time I cried because someone had chickened out, vanishing into thin air leaving all promises unfulfilled and still is. This time, work has driven me mad. I couldn't handle all my tasks with just one pair of hands anymore. It's gotten to a stage where everyone thinks I'm some kinda super woman who could just juggle knives and fireballs with one hand. I'm tired. Very tired. When can I stop and take a rest? Do I have to wait till the day I'm six feet underground to be able to R.I.P?

Perhaps I should go on a course whereby they teach you, a) how to manage your work and life; b) how to manage and/or handle people; c) how to say NO to every requested task that's forever urgent; d) how not to think you are a superwoman and push your workload to others; e) how to talk to your team leaders and perhaps how to talk as well; and maybe f) how to be happy again. Note the 'again'. I used to be happy, carefree, and there to bring smiles to people's life. Now they've robbed me of what I only had. I'm more filled with sorrows than smiles now, albeit the fact that both start with 's'.

Sometimes I wonder why and what am I doing here? No kin, no friends, nobody. Why? No doubt I've come a long way, but made a friend of loneliness. Sometimes I wish I had someone there to share my times with, guess I'm picky with whom I choose. Who could I to blame? No one. No doubt again I've come a long way, and I so hate it when people tell me to give up; to think that I'll always have home to fall back on if all else fails. I do not like that. I know the intention may be well, but it does not encourage nor give me the support and strength I could need to pull through here on my own. I do not like to submit to the fate that I can always depend on home if I fail over here. I like and am proud how I've managed this far in living alone on my own, apart from the fact that I need to learn how to sort out myself, my life, my sorrowful outlook, my being. Remember, I must learn how not to run away again. Oh, someone, please give me the courage I need to pull through this.

I shall find a way to make myself happy again. Who likes reading entries that're always full of frustration, anger and sadness? I don't. I think I'm falling ill. My throat feels sore. Who shall care for me? Who will care for me? Me, myself and I.

P.S. I thought, perhaps looking forward, at least to some comfort in seeking a shoulder to cry on while lamenting a hard day's work after this long tedious day was able to realise. However I gotta laugh at myself - when have I ever been lucky to have such a luxury here? I've not gotten its favour. And so I borrowed my own shoulders.

Finally

2006-09-29T16:28:00.000+01:00

It is kinda ridiculous when one expects you to have the redesigned product/website LIVE in the morning at 9.30am so that we can have an email alert sent out to all subscribers to show them "hey, LOOK! We've gotten our product rebranded" on the online product's website before the hard copy actually reaches their hands. Yesh, no problem, I can do that, providing I have a race with the dawn to see who reaches work first. So by right I start work at 9.30am, so now in order to win this race with dawn, what time should I start work?

Anyway I was there already at 8.30am, this is the best I could arrive to compete in my race. And so had I for the past week. Imagine 11 hours everyday! But I'm glad my baby has grown wings and taken off, though not a totally smooth flight, still I manage to get it to fly. It's been really really hard work. Now, my baby is looking much better - organised, clean and unified design for both parent and its child websites.

Thinking finally I'd be able to have some peace of mind after this major baby's done, guess I was wrong...

Sacré bleu

Have a break... Have a Kit Kat

2006-09-21T23:07:00.000+01:00

I can't wait for the better times to come. Not that I'm complaining, but this is simply too much for I to bear. Work is getting atrociously hard to manage with all these piling tasks. I've got a major product or rather website to redesign and to go LIVE next Thursday. Time frame was short and given at such short notice too and the current site that I'm redesigning is complicating itself with its many nooks plus confusing navigation plus numerous different templates and its giving me quite a hard time tackling them. I like this bit of challenge in work, at least it's different from what I normally do with the boring mundane tasks. It's fine if it was the only task I have on hand to handle. But I haven't got the luxury of time to, I've got 2 other more products (websites) and many microsites/landing sites to look after. Man! I think I have a headache even as I type this. *shrugs* I'm finding it hard to juggle. I've brought this up to my team leader, she knows, but still I'm dumped with all these pile of shite workload. Is this how working life is like in the UK? I've never worked so hard EVER back home. And I swear it simply just gets harder with each new job. Is this call adulthood?

I do like facing these challenges but I've got a limit to all these. Not that I hate it (sometimes I do), but I need my space to breathe! I can't cope! I need to chill down! I need to get organised (not that I'm not one organised freak)! I need to get into control again! It's not only work that has been keeping me busy and draining me away. My personal life is just as busy. I can't breathe! I need some personal space! I want to and I wish I could just drop everything behind and run off somewhere and have a nice time all to myself, recharge and get back to my hectic life once more.

I need a break? I need a Kit Kat?

Have a break... Have a Kit Kat

SHITTY THURSDAY

2006-09-14T18:03:00.000+01:00

I'M IN A BAD MOOD TODAY! LOUSY MOOD! JUST WANT TO MAKE IT KNOWN!

i HATE:

- WAITING

- MAKING MISTAKES

- GETTING PISSED OFF BY RANDOM PEOPLE

- BEING THROWN WITH STOOPID ENQUIRIES WHEN I NEED THE TIME TO DO MY WORK INSTEAD

- CSS NOT BEING COORPERATIVE

- NOT ABLE TO FIGURE OUT WHAT WRONG WITH MY CODINGS, WHY WON'T THEY WORK, BUT WORKS FINE IF I'M USING ANOTHER SET OF EXACTLY SAME CODES BUT WITH A DIFFERENT FILE NAME IN THE CMS

- WAITING, WAITING, WAITING!

- NOT ABLE TO HAVE TIME TO BREATHE AND RELAX!

- ARGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

- ARGHHHH!!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!

- I HATE WASTING MY TIME WAITING WHEN I COULD HAVE BETTER USE FOR IT

NOW I JUST WANT TO CRY AND LET IT ALL OUT AND I'LL BE FINE.

II. Letters from the heart...

2006-09-07T23:27:00.000+01:00

II. Letters from the heart...

Thursday, 7 September 2006, UK

Dear Pea,

All my life I've been running. I've been running all my life. Amazing how ironic it is, I hate running, the least thing I would love doing and yet I've been doing it for as long as I can remember. I've been running ever since I could remember. I'm repeating over and over about this, imagine how an impact it must have been on me? I think I'm a runner. You could say that. Or at least that's what I said. I'm running. Away. And it's starting to, or in fact, already has taken quite a toll on me. I'm tired. I just want to stop and stay put - doesn't necessary means literally staying put, I'm mental. I've had enough of this running. Away. When one can't handle; do not know how to handle, one runs. Away. I ran away from home - again not literally; I ran away from people - especially one-who-shall-not-be-named, I lived in fear; now I'm running away from whatever. I'm sick, I cannot run anymore. I'm actually pretty tough, I just forget about that. All the time. Please remind me that I'm brave, fearless, funny (when did that get into this serious letter?), and confident. Why should I be running? Away.

Love,
Pea

II. Letters from within the heart...

2006-08-25T13:01:00.000+01:00

II. Letters from within the heart...

Thursday, 17 August 2006, UK

Dear Chestnut,

Could I say that I really fancy you alot? Really like you alot? I think about you alot too. All the time. You're always on my mind and thoughts. I wanna spend time together with you. Hanging out together. Chatting together. I wanna get to know you better. I like being with you. I like to see you smile. I like to make you smile to see your smile. And yes, making you laugh to hear and see your laughters, that too. But you hardly laugh for I to catch.

I like you talking to me, being beside me, hanging out together and enjoying one another's company. I've become so used to your non-existence existence. And one day of not being able to see you or have your non-existence felt or hear from you is sometimes unbearable. I like seeing you, especially on days when your hair looks really cool - is that all I could think of? I like chatting with you. I like annoying you with my nonsensical behaviour and words. You make me feel silly at times and yet so myself. Yet sometimes you make me sad, and really pisses me off as well. Often, you make me miss you too. But I never know how you feel. You don't say. I never bothered finding out.

We have alot in common, maybe. There're so many things we can talk about and feel for, and yet at times nothing, maybe. I like that anyhow. It's really hard to have someone here come by whom I can feel so fun with, with all our common likes and such. Sometimes we can be so silly together. I like that, us being silly when it's time to be funny.

I do wanna be with you, sharing our times together while holding hands, getting connected. I wish to wrap my arms around you, and you I. I want you to know that I really like you, though I feel that we can't really really be together, otherwise it would have; might kill, all the feelings I have for you. This may not be love nor a crush, but more so of a desire to share my life with you where we will blossom into true friendship and be a great companion and friend for each other through life together, perhaps? Am I only kidding myself? I beg to differ?

I really like you loads, but deep down I know you're not the one. Perhaps you might have started forgetting the times we had together, perhaps I ought to move on or perhaps should had. Come what may, I'll be happy to see you happy even if it's seeing you being happy to kiss the some girl you will grow to like and love and cherish one day. Friends should be happy for one another. I like to see my friends being happy. I'll make my friends smile. I like that. No doubt I like you, friend or not.

Love,
Pea

P.S DJ Ferry Corsten's Hearts Connected (Trance mix) playing in the background as I typed...

P.S.S Have I found a mushroom in the chestnut? Maybe.

I. Letters from the heart...

2006-08-24T14:22:00.000+01:00

I. Letters from the heart...

Dear Pea,

Friday, 18 August 2006, UK

I received Potatoe's letter. I read the letter. I feel warm. I wish Potatoe's beside me, and I beside Potatoe. I love reading letters from the Potatoe.

Saturday, 19 August 2006, UK

"In your letter, you sounded very 'alone' or should I say emotionally? Isolated? Event though there are housemates and colleagues, I guess the true friendship is the hardest thing to be replaced!"

I told Potatoe that I couldn't agree with her more in the letter. True friendship is distant from me now.

"Where's the Pea whom always have something to crap about and bring light to my darkest days? Come back! Looking forward to your return!"

I will when I'm done with what is needed to be done by me here. I'm looking forward to reunite with my veggie babes again!

Sunday, 20 August 2006, UK

I bought the same set of hearts pyjamas I've gotten for Mushroom. HAPPY BIRTHDAY Aubergine!

Tuesday, 22 August 2006, UK

I'm HAPPY today, because I teased Beef and made Zucchini laughed; because I get to be paid overtime for the certain selected task at work; because I heard from Mushroom - she's safe and fine; because I get to chat a little with my veggie babes; because I got work done too; because I switched to listening to UK's Virgin Xtreme radio instead of Yes93.3FM which keeps disconnecting and I love the english band songs played; because I'm simply happy for no so reason at all; because we went out during lunch time to get a b'day card for the BB (nicknamed Binary Boy).

Wednesday, 23 August 2006, UK

I'm SAD today, because I got up late, left the house late, the tube came late and went real slow; because I was late for work; because I left my lunch at home in the fridge; because the network drives at work are not working fine and slowed down my working speed big time; because I didn't get to speak to my veggie babes; because people do not have the mood to keep to their words.

Love,
Pea

I. Letters from within the heart...

2006-08-22T11:29:00.000+01:00

I. Letters from within the heart...

Dear Mushroom,

I guess no other veggie or chestnut or someone will be able to replace your mushroom status...

Thursday, 17 August 2006, UK /

Friday, 18 August 2006, SG

On the day you left, I called you. I'm sad that you won't be around when I'm back. But I'm happy for your new embarkment in life. It's gonna be grand! I'm so happy for you, yet so sad for myself. Fret not for me, worry more about yourself. You've gotta be strong for yourself and take care of yourself now that (like me) you're really really out there on your own. We'll be able to share our experiences being out there really really on our own alone! It'll be exciting, I promise.

Friday, 18 August 2006, UK / US

A day after you left, life goes on as usual I suppose. Things to do, life to taste, people to see, paths to cross. Have you got by? Step foot on foreign land? How does it feel to be there finally? I've not been there. Someday I'm gonna. I will! Right now, you've got yourself a new life to realise and to settle down. To set your feet firm. 3 years to go.

Saturday, 19 August 2006, UK / US

Two days after you left, I wonder how you are. Is the morning air fresher there? How does dawn and dusk differ? Isn't it great to experience seasons finally? It's gonna be fun. Wish I was there to share those with. Maybe one day, someday.

Sunday, 20 August 2006, UK / US

Three days after you left, have you gotten use to the new around you? Are you safe and sound? How does it feel for your feet stepping on non-home ground? Missing home already? Better not, you don't wanna be there (there, as in the home sickness). Trust me.

Love,
Pea

P.S. I'll be waiting for the day where I can give you your long awaited hugs and muacks! Hang on dear mushroom!

II. Letters from the heart to the heart...

2006-08-21T12:15:00.000+01:00

II. Letters from the heart to the heart...

Sunday, 30 July 2006 - London, UK

Dear Potatoe,

I miss the times we spent digging through or rather you digging through the pile of stuffs/clothes at FCUK, H&M, accessorize, etc. during the sales. Now I'll have to do it on my own, though not as great a job as you did.

I miss the times we would get lost trying to figure out the right way on the A-Z, and I'll let you handle the navigating from what past experiences tell me. Now I'll have to navigate with what sense of direction I have with the help from people on the streets. Heck it, sometimes I still get lost even with the help.

I miss the times we would hang out and chill in the Richmond Park, Hyde Park, St. James Park, watching the proof of season coming season going. Now I'll have to try get my own arse out. I've made it far only during lunch hours now in the summer with my co-workers from time to time. It just don't feel the same.

I miss the time when we can just bitch about anything, like the old witch and English men for example. Now I'll have to make do with Priska playing your role, however it just don't feel the same and not using Chinese too, even though she's a Libra too.

I miss the times where we will lie in our beds in our big room, chatting about anything under the sun, till we get tired into the wee hours. Now I have the whole room to myself but no gossiping sessions in it anymore.

It has been great this holiday making visa, being on it with you. Thank you so much. No regrets. I will be thinking and missing the good and bad times we've shared during this brief journey in UK. I hope you'll find your direction soon and snap out of this lost direction soon. I'll be there with you, listening if I can't be there in person. Hope some day, we'll be able to travel together again. In the meantime, take great care! You've been dearly miss! Lots of love, muacks and hugs.

Love,
Pea

I. Letters from the heart to the heart...

2006-08-19T10:34:00.000+01:00

In the next couple of days or weeks (depending) to follow, I'll be posting a series of letters that I wrote onto my blog - which may be or may not be in order of date, which may have been sent out or may never be send out. Through them you may be able to follow me through my journey in UK, how I change and how I feel. However, please take note that the letters you will be reading may not be of the actual real whole content of the letter/s itself.

So... Here's one for you first.

I. Letters from the heart to the heart...

Sunday, 30 July 2006 - London, UK

Dear Babe,

It's amazing that I managed to get through this job offer right before I was supposed to head home for good this march. Little did we know, there's such a twist to fate and *pooftz* I'm back here again. I admit I was sad when I had to leave UK (for good), didn't want to be back to SG yet as I've not had enough of travelling in the Europe (but I'm back here again). And when I was back in SG, it all felt like a dream, like I've never worked and lived in London before. So contradicting life is. So weird. However I'm glad I'm able to be back here again. The first time last year, the experience was more fun as I had my friend, Potatoe, with me. We have the same asian frequency , we hang out together. This second time round, I'm on my own now. At first it was fun as I was dazzled by all new around me; my new job, new colleagues, new lifestyle in a way without Potatoe. But after a while when I've passed this dazzling phase, it starts to hit me back and I've never been more homesick than ever. I started to miss everything about SG - family, friends, my comfort zone. I was often moody, depressed and anti-social. So I tried getting in touch with listening to chinese songs on Yes93.3FM at work. Haha... now after this homesickness phase is passing, I'm starting to be better already. I guess the many SALES here helped a lot. But poor pockets. I really need to save and start travelling more! Hee... hope all is well for you back home. Sorry if I don't write/email you lot as much as I used to. I'm on the road to my self-discovery now. I'm learning and am lovin' it! Missing you lots! Muacks!

Love,
Pea

跑

2006-08-10T23:59:00.000+01:00

每当遇到心理上的问题。我都是一声不吭，转身就跑。
真是个窝囊物呀！难到跑开就是解决问题的方法吗？
那当然不是，但是我就是没有多大的勇气去面对它。
唯一能做到的就是把跑路。
有好多时候想要面对但是还没面对，对方以替我做出了决定。
那就是遗忘以及心碎降临。

Just a Thursday

2006-08-10T22:50:00.000+01:00

1. During Lunch Break

I was out on the streets in China Town. I left my colleague to go get me some oyster sauce while she ordered a b'day cake for her boyfriend's birthday party this coming weekend. I was stopped by some oriental guy (English refers to Indians as Asians, and we chinese as orientals or chinese, perhaps) asking for directions to chinese massage shops. He spoke really fluent (China) mandarin.

I pointed in the direction of where he might be able to find where he wants to go, but it can be tricky with the streets, but I didn't tell him about the tricky streets. I just pointed in that direction. He asked if it will cost. Dunno. Maybe at least £25-30 for one? He asked if I was from China. No. He asked if I was from Taiwan. No. He asked if I was from Hong Kong. No. He asked where was I from then. Singapore. He's from Korea. I must say I was impressed. He's tall, single eyelids, small eyes, glasses, nice smile, kinda tan, cute maybe.

Pity I had to get back to work, but first I had to find my colleague again - for she doesn't have her security pass with her to the office doors.Otherwise, who knows, I might had decided to show this korean-who-speaks-fluent-mandarin-guy where he could find the place on the tricky streets. Then I could had tried to find out more about him. How did he manage such perfect mandarin? How did he grow to be that tall? What was he doing in London? Why was he looking for a chinese massage? Questions that are not gonna be answered just because I had the excuse of work waiting for me, of course he does not know. And my colleague needs me to get into the office, and of course he does not know. I simply smiled and walked away. I let the possibility of having found yet another new friend slipped away just like that. I pictured we would hit it off pretty well, and I can speak in the comforts of my mother tongue again. Oh yeah... little miss day dreamer.

2. After Lunch Break, During Work

Emails kept shooting across amongst our screens the whole of the day non-stop. We five (or rather I) couldn't concentrate on work totally. Think everyone's in a it's-not-Thursday-but-Friday mood.

Bits of our email conversations:

ME: I once had a senior who’s absolutely nuts about Garfield. She always wears Garfield Tees to college.

Mark: You had a senior?

ME: Means I'm not in contact with her anymore. Hence the past tense - had

Mark: But that would imply that you could ‘have’ a senior?

Chrissy: Loose translation of “once knew”

Mark: So if I was referring to my old friend allan, I would say ‘I had a guy called allan’

ME: Hi my name is Angela. I come from Singapore. I speak Singlish.

I swear I nearly bursted out laughing when I read that 'I had a guy called allan'. For a moment there I believed I buried my head in my hands and gave out a silent laugh. Oh, hang on a minute, I think the burying of head was to the fact that Mark said he is using a garfield duvet cover now at home as he loves Garfield. Somebody get this guy a lollipop please?

3. Random

-- Trixy reminded me my serious crush back in polyhood whom I had nearly forgotten his existence. Garfield (nickname given by me)
-- Went to watch My Super Ex-Girldfriend after work. Great Laughs
-- Finished reading The History of Love. Nice book. Very different writing styles from what I've been used to. Reading it again to gasp it all in
-- Gotten Trixy's postcard in the mail. Cute little bears postcard. Thanks potatoe!
-- Gotten my long-await debit card, the previous one was damaged. I can draw some cash again!

Happy Birthday Singapore!

2006-08-09T23:12:00.000+01:00

Once again it's Singapore's Birthday!!!

Happy 41st Birthday Singapore!!!

Though I may not be home at this point in time to celebrate
Nor catch the NDP glamour on TV at home
Nor stay out with friends to watch the lovely fireworks display
But no matter where I go where I am
My heart still belongs to you!
You've got me in my heart, in my mind 24/7
I LOVE MY COUNTRY!

Birmingham

2006-08-07T23:47:00.000+01:00

*SATURDAY*

Went up to Birmingham with Mark for the weekend. We stayed at Joe's place.

Joe's absolutely nuts. Met up with their mates. They are all crazy fun. Hell of a time.

We drank, we chat, we laugh, we happy!

*SUNDAY*

Mark and Joe showed ME around Brum (Birmingham).

Walked about Bull Ring.

Fish & Chips at the Malt House.

Movie - Angel.A - crazy french film.

I made us Chinese dinner.

Tomato + Egg

Chicken + Garlic + Onion + Broccoli

Rice

We had dessert.

Tarte Aux Pommes

Mark, Joe, ME had great laughs!

* from L - R, Top - Bottom*

Victoria Square

Selfridges (Bull Ring)

Balconies

Ferries Wheel

The Malt House

Bull Ring

Mark, Jim

Jon

Susie, ME

Susie

Joe

Mark, Joe

ME, Mark

Jim, Joe

*TAH DAH*

Ingredients of Birmingham

P.S. Sorry, unfortunately Sarah's missing above. She's shy girl.

I'm spiteful

2006-07-12T12:20:00.000+01:00

Sometimes I can be quite spiteful. That's what Mark, my colleague, was commenting on me through email at work yesterday. Before that, we were sort of expressing our views on passive smoking being more harmful and some other issues of discussions. I must say our emails, or rather mine was kinda hostile in tone. He said I was just feeling bitter. Oh well, what's gotten into me of late?!

I am bitter and spiteful. Gee... not been much of a good day at work eh. And to add on to that, in the course of the past few weeks; I made a number of blunders at work, forgotten to take my debit card after a purchase at some store in Manchester (was there for a break the recent weekend), had to miss watching the world cup finals as I'm on my way home from Manchester in the train (didn't realised the finals date when booking the train tics), in cranky moods. I'm like a landmine, ready to blow up if not carefully treaded upon.

Could this be a beach-withdrawal-symptom? Missing parts in my life? Good (veggie) friends absence?

Anyway I'll be going to Dance Valley this coming Friday in Holland! Yippy! At least that's something to look forward too! And once I'm back, I'll be able to see Syndy in London! Yay! Think I miss Fab4 too much. This time it really hit me right smack hard now that I'm truely back here in London on my own! Man, it sure is tough! Not that I dislike it, just that it's really taking me quite a bit to realise and adapt. Finally? What took so long?!

Sigh, I don't even know what's gonna happen once my visa runs out. I would love to be back again in the comforts of home but I would also love to be in the comforts of freedom I can get away from home. It's not gonna be easy to get a work permit here I dare say. There's a very high possibility that I might have to pack up and wave goodbye to London next year. There's still so much I want to do and travel in Europe. I find myself racing againt time! Am I just getting paranoid or something? It's only July you may say, but before you know it, winter's gonna come and then spring where I have to leave. Somebody, please smack me! Am I thinking too far? I'm just getting upset and irritated over nothing. Must learn how to relax! I'm trying to! I just want to laugh at myself! Hahaha! Gee, I can be so random.

To end off. I would like to say,"I'm angry because I care. I'm a very caring person."

Nintendo DS Lite - black

2006-06-29T20:58:00.000+01:00

Woo la la.. I've just bought a DS Lite today during lunch :) I wanted the white one, it looks really cool. I find it looking like an apple product! I have a white ipod nano! But neh, the white would get dirty easily. So I settled for the black, and no regrets! :)

Mark, my colleague, was in New York the past few days on a business trip. He was supposed to help me get my DS lite there but unfortunately his card had problems with NY. Anyhow he managed to help me get some DS games on my To Get list! Cool! So with the DS games, I definately gotta get the DS lite itself then.

The DS games were much cheaper in US as compared to UK. So I managed to get Harry Potter, Brain Academy, Meteos for £45. That's quite a saving!!! Imagine one game alone could cost about £20 each in UK. My DS had an offer, one game (I gotten Brain Training) + DS at £110, otherwise it would be £99 for the DS alone. That's cool I got 4 games + DS for £155! (All figures are rounded off to the nearest) Now I have a new companion on transportation with me :)

So.... Look out for my reviews on the 4 games in blogs to come.

lovely surprise from the mushroom

2006-06-27T22:08:00.000+01:00

:) I got home from work today. Passed the stairs and saw there's a package from Singapore for me. I wonder who could it be from. I picked it up, opened it, and *tah dah* a pressie + letter from Lisi (mushroom)!!! Aww.. how sweet of her! I love surprises :)

It was a lovely scheduler. Perfect! Just what I needed! However here's the twist. If only Lisi had mailed it out to me earlier, I would have been happily filling it out with ink NOW! Unfortunately I bought a similiar scheduler over here too just a few days ago, and ink's already terrorizing within it. So I'm gonna be Super Panda for the next 12 months at least before I turn into Between You and Me. Haha... Thanks Lisi! *MUACKS*

* mushroom = lisi
pea = me

Holland VS Portugal - World Cup 2006

2006-06-25T21:23:00.000+01:00

Oh my God! Albeit I'm not really a soccer soccer person, I must say I've never quite enjoyed tonight's match more than ever!

Cristiano Ronaldo crying for getting off the field (bet he should be crying now how lucky to be kept off the remaining of the match and not getting yellow/red card/s), 16 yellow cards, 4 red cards (2 each team), fighting going on behind the referee's back, 6 minutes extra time. Never been more amused. I was hoping that Holland would stand a chance to win, but it seems pretty unpromising as the game played along. I had wished to see both Holland and England playing against each other in the next match. It's been a really entertaining match nonetheless. Never laughed nor cried nor felt more anguished this ever.

I just so loved it when the commentor said,"16 yellow cards.. who cares... it's been ridiculous!"

Hell ridiculous it's been! That's right! LMAO!

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince - book 6

2006-06-25T21:06:00.000+01:00

I can't believe the ending to 6th book! Dumbledore's DEAD! Snape KILLED him! I wish it wouldn't have been so. It was so shocking! I was devastated and sad that I teared during the last 2-3 chapters. Dang! Shocker! Heart breaker! But it's been marvelously well written. Great book! I can't wait to read the 7th book when it comes out. And of course like me, there are many other Harry Potter readers out there who has the same belief as I, i.e. Dumbledore's not really dead!

So, check this site out: www.dumbledoreisnotdead.com

"Song" below inspired by above aftermath of reading the book. *giggles*

Title: Beach longing

Whenever I ever wanted to be alone, feeling all down and lost.
All I ever wished to do was to be there by the beach.
Sitting down on the soft sand, facing the waves before me.
Listening to their sound of music, soothing it may be to my nerves.
At least they allowed me to seek some solace and comfrot from.
With no need of a permission or what so ever.
I can freely set my heart free from my sufferrings.
They spread their invisible arms around me with patience.
Alone in their presence I can find myself facing all day.
Admiring the beautidul dawn to dusk I can.

P.S. "They" referring to the waves/beach

cookies

2006-06-22T22:33:00.000+01:00

Made some cookies! It had been fun trying to bake! Woo hoo.. It's been over a decade!

Tried 3 seperate attempts (on different days). First attempt had been horrible. I put too much margarine, but it's still tasty. So for the second atempt I put in lesser margarine. And tried putting in some butter for the third attempt as I havne't enough margarine. Tsk tsk... I brought cookies to work from the second and third attempts. They all at work loved my cookies! Even my housemates! *beams* Now they call me the cookie queen. Haha.. My colleagues call me Cake Biscuit (as it tasted so) or Cookie at times now.

But I think my third attempt was the best batch! I'm defiately gonna try a forth attempt! Might try putting a chocolate chunk in each cookie next round. It only gets better. Hee.

Here's the simple recipe I found online:

Soft baked choco chips cookies
1 cup margarine
3/4 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup white sugar
3/4 cup vanilla custard
2 1/4 cup flour
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp vanilla
2 eggs
2 cups choco chips

1] cream margarine, sugar and custard together
2] add eggs
3] add rest except choco chips
4] mix well and add choco chips
5] drop by teaspoons onto cookie sheets
6] bake at 185 degrees

P.S. it was mentioned 1 pkg vanilla pudding, but I couldn't find it, hence used the vanilla custard as the substitute, which I would say turned out really well :)

In the London oven

2006-06-12T13:17:00.000+01:00

I’ve never like to curse and swear, but fuck it. It’s like being in an oven out there, especially when you’re stuck in the tube for a fucking hour!!! When it finally budged and got to Acton Town, the whole station has to close. Oh lovely! I love getting delays in an oven due to rail signal probs. Then I hafta walk all the way under the fucking hot sun all sweaty to catch a bus to Shepherds Bush in the fucking hot bus. But I had a fucking pleasant journey in the oven again to Oxford Circus station to change to Bakerloo line to Piccadlilly Circus. Don’t one just love the transport system in London? I know I do. Fuck cares.

*shrugs*

*clears throat*

So… hows everyone coming along back home then eh? Bet the SMRT is never that bad like what happened to me this morning trying my fucking best to get to work in time only to end up near 2 fucking hours late!

A list of choices

2006-06-06T13:06:00.000+01:00

Life is about choices.. summer is here. We are all braced with many choices in life... so here's a list of mine. Tsk tsk...

I would either have to get a new pair of jeans or shed some extra weight off
I would either have to get new skirts for the summer or get my mum to mail over some of mine from home
I would either have to get a new pair of sunglasses or squint my eyes under the sun
I would either have to get a new TV or make do without cartoons and drama in my life
I would either have to get a decent shoe rack or scatter my shoes all over the room
I would either have to get a big towel to lay on while tanning or remain fair in the rare UK summer
I would either have to get nice summer dresses or miss out on the perfect chance to ever wear them here
I would either have to get more shorts to wear at home or keep wearing the only pair without washing for weeks
I would either have to get summer open toe footwear or let my feet stink beneathe my covered shoes

The list of things (materal) I want in life. The list goes on and on for sure...

Officially a year

2006-05-25T23:42:00.000+01:00

With reference to this previous blog of mine - a month into london , I think it's time to review it once more. As of 24th May 2006, I've now been living in the UK for a year.

Here's my review from last's year's:
Now a ~~month~~ year into London, so what's it about that I'm missing from home? Family and friends excluded as they have always been missed.

Radio Stations & Music Variety - ~~There's alot more black music here, not that I have anything against them. They are nice.~~
I take that back. I love the music stations here! I think there are lesser radio commercials too! Cool! But I do miss hearing chinese songs over the radio back home.

My PC & broadband! - I miss stoning in front of my PC in the wee hours doing nothing! Hahaha!
No doubt about this still! Though I do that here but it's just not the same as back home!

~~Shopping~~ - ~~It's so much cheaper back home!!!!~~
Correction: Things back home are getting more expensive. You can get things cheap if you know where to find here. But I think Bugis area is getting greater than before to shop back home. I like it there still.

Authentic Asian Food - I MISS nasi padang!!!! Pineapple rice!!! Some chinese food here don't even taste nor look chinese!!
You betcha! I want my nasi padang still!!!

MRT & SBS/buses - I miss the aircon and speed. It's stuffy in the transport here when the weather gets hot. It's much cheaper back home too!!!
The tube/transport system here practically sucks especially during the weekends, what to do since it's been a really old system. Way back...

Fruits - Much cheaper! So much more! I want my papaya!
Exotic fruits like pineapple and papaya and yes, watermelon are rare here, you'll be surprised! And they cost!

Bed & Pillows & Bloaster - I MISS my baby bloaster!
*sobs* But I have my own room now! So yippy!

Beaches(Sentosa) & East Coast Park - I MISS Sentosa which had been at my expanse! I MISS all the blading at ECP!

Playgrounds - There's one in every estate/neighbourhood you turn into back home! It's hard to find a decent one here! I wanna play on the swing!

Weather - Though the weather can be stinking hot back home, but it's always summer all year round, just 2 seasons - rainy and non-rainy. I kinda miss those stormy weather at times, especially in the mornings! Snugging beneath my warm blanky with me baby bloaster! I miss the consistence in weather too albeit the fact that I do enjoy the different seasons here. Think I like it here in late Spring - early Autumn. Winter? No thank you. And dang, it's never even snowed here, real snow! None. I must make sure I get to try snowboarding out this time round! Hmm... Come to think of it, this year's Spring is really late. Last year this time, the trees would all be green and full, now those outside my house are still pretty bare, not as full blown as last year's. Oh dear...

Ah, but there must be stuffs here that I'm enjoying and liking! You betcha!

Cherries & Strawberries - It's their season!! Much cheaper too! YUMMY!!!
You only get those in Spring mostly. It's nice, I'm finally able to taste fresh cherries and strawberries again :) Just had one minutes ago.

Pastry, Cakes, Cookies, Desserts! - Simply heaven! Yummylicious! Wide choices! I simply LOVE the carrort cake at one of the cafe at Sloane Square!!!
ARGH! I've put on 5kg since last year! I'm horrible! No. THEY are horrible! They can't do this to me!!! (They meaning the desserts, etc.) BTW Krispy Kreme Donuts are the BEST donuts one could ever have in life!

Marks & Spencer - LOVE it though not cheap! ~~The food! The sandwiches! Best!~~
No doubt M&S is good, but I've found pleasures in the other supermart/sandwich shops here like Waitrose, Pret A Manger, Eat, Fresh & Wild, etc. Yeah! Sandwich here rules!

Fashion - Dress as you like! So much more shops, varieties, choices! So much much more! Men here dress up more too! Cool~
I love looking at people's dressing here! They really good at it! And the guys are so cute here. Hee hee... my eyes are going ga ga... ha ha!

People - All sorts: weird, funny, scary, cute, charming, cool, interesting, shocking, rude, good, etc. Different mixtures, more than Singapore!
Yeah, it's fun meeting all sorts! And I have really great new colleagues, and I still keep in touch with the ex-colleagues too. I've been hanging out with them, new or old. And housemates too. Making new friends too. So it's been really keeping me busy.

MTVs - Yeah and certain shows too, like Will & Grace, SATC, both sexually hilarious.
Unfortunate to say, I don't have those to watch anymore since last July. But I like some of the local programmes/documentaries. Little Britian's wicked! And the cartoons too! A pity the TV in my room has died on me. So goodbye to Mr. TV!

Supermarkets & Sandwiches - Too many choices!
Yes, refer to #3. I've never had such a hard time with deciding which sandwich or bread to get. I'm spoilt for choices! Wraps are great too! *beams*

SALES/Shopping - Only time when things cost cheaper : sales!
Definately! H&M, Primark, they have been filling my wardrobe. A nice dress at H&M range from £15 (approx. S$45) onwards. That's cheap! But wait... wait till you've heard about Primark! Imagine a pair of shoes for as cheap as £6 (approx. S$18 ), a nice necklace from £1.50 (approx. S$4.50), bags from as cheap as £3 (S$9). Heaven! TK Maxx is another killer too! I try not to get in there and stay away from it as far as I can. However, I gotten my fav. Miss Sixty jeans there at slightly less than £20 (approx. S$60! Imagine you get those for S$300 at least from the boutique!) Now I'm just waiting for the sales to come. I've been spending too much in 2005! I'm now trying real hard to save and not spend too much so that I can go travel more. So far it's been.. hmm I better not say. Let's just put it that I've managed to get to Italy, Paris and Vienna to date in 2006. (I've not spent money on shopping in those countries! WOW! Amazing! How unlike me!) Also planning a holiday or 2 or 3 to look forward to in June/July/August.

(Flea) Markets, Museums, Parks - Awesome! I'm fascinated by Richmond Park.
The markets about Liverpool street area (Spitalfields, Petticoat Lane) I love! Haven't been to the museums much, perhaps I should look into that. Next garden/park on my list must be the Kew Gardens! I need to find someone to come along with me then. Tsk tsk...

Stockings & Boots - Good for the cooler weather. Woo lala! I'm gonna wear those!
It's cool to be able to wear boots here! And nice stockings/leggings too! I wanna get more boots when the cooler weather comes again. For now I'm happy to have summer come upon the cold UK once more! I wanna go about in short skirts/shorts wearing flip flops! Don't wanna put on winter clothes! Figured I had enuff of those! Had enuff of the cold as well!!!

Movies - I have always enjoy going to the cinema, just don't like paying for the extortions that's all. However now that's changed! A few of us from work have gathered and form The Cinema Club, where we go watch movies a few times together every month. We all signed up for this Unlimited Movie Pass, for just £13.99 (approx. S$42) per month we can watch as many movies as we want to! That's absolutely freaking fabulous! Woo hoo! In April alone I dare say I've been to 6 movies already! Be it alone or with colleagues. Now dig this! That's what I call a great bargain! It's even better than the Singapore Film Society I'd join back home.

Clubbing - I love the clubbing scene here! It rocks! Much better music and crowd as compared to back home. However alot of people do drugs here in the clubs, so that bit I HATE! Drugs and drinking here are really a very big problem. Smoking too. Very bad, but music's great! Can't complain to that. Haha... I love Fabric (a club in London)! There're a number of other nice ones as well. Many.

So there you go! I dare say I'm still having a great time here~~, other than the darn HOT weather otherwise perfect~~. (It's hardly been very HOT the past year. Hope 2006's summer will be better than last year's) ~~Gimme a few more months before asking me once more.~~ *Grinz* I must say that I really am having a fantastic time back here again after starting on my second new job after 2 weeks break from home in March. Though work's getting very stressful and busy lately, I'm hanging on and trying to keep cool.

Think I'm definately gonna miss my life here in UK when I do go home some day. We'll just see how things go then. *smiles* In the meantime, I'm gonna make whatever time I have here well spent. You bet!

I'm just a girl who...

2006-05-23T07:50:00.000+01:00

100 things about me... you may not already know...

I'm just a girl who ________________________ every now and then.

likes to eat alot

likes a hug

likes the feeling of wind in her face

likes to read alot

likes to stare at people

dislikes talking

dislikes being alone sometimes

dislikes being treated like a baby

dislikes putting on weight

dislikes complexity

loves shopping

loves being at the beach

loves a nice dessert

loves being pampered

loves going to the movies

hates men's guts

hates being taken for granted

hates being told off

hates being left out

hates losing

does what she wants

does blush

does her laundry

does drink

does clubbing

doesn't bathe

doesn't keep her word

doesn't care

doesn't wakes up to her alarm

doesn't know what to do

wants attention

wants some loving

wants more money

wants to know what's on other's mind

wants people to love her

needs her own space

needs a praise

needs a good break

needs a haircut

needs a direction

enjoys travelling

enjoys meeting new people

enjoys a good laugh

enjoys having plenty of freedom

enjoys hanging out having fun

tries to learn a little Italian

tries to cook something different

tries learning more about herself

tries to sleep more

tries eating lesser

misses her family

misses the Fab4 very often

misses being at the beach

misses Japan

misses her bus/tube

falls from blading

falls in love with silly boys

falls hard from falling in love with silly boys

falls for a trick

falls for stripes / pokka dots / checkereds

can be responsible

can be very quiet

can be very serious

can be very lazy

can put a smile on people's faces

cannot stop daydreaming

cannot stand laziness

cannot be bothered

cannot be provoked

cannot accept NO for an answer

feels lonely without the Fab4

feels sexy

feels a need to be silly

feels tired

feels a need for chocolates

wonders where do babies come from

wonders how to rob a bank

wonders what others think about her

wonders about the future

wonders what to do in life

thinks alot about crappy stuffs like #77 for example

thinks about what to have for her meal/s

thinks about boys

thinks highly of herself

thinks the world needs better people

pretends to be a know-it-all

pretends to be asleep on public transport

pretends to understand

pretends not to listen

pretends to play mind games with people

gets depressed

gets what she wants

gets hyper active

gets cranky

gets bad hair days

has (new) secrets

has a new top

has troubles

has insomnia

has certain fetish

Monologue

2006-05-19T21:25:00.000+01:00

"I guess I've muddled things up again without knowing what's it exactly I've done. It just drives me nuts. They never tell me what the root of it all exactly is anyway. I must have been thick. I really haven't a clue. It just cuts a bit of my heart away each freaking time. No wonder I haven't got any senses left. The nerves and tissues must be so hell of a messed up with each shed. Hell have a must been. What does it matter that I cry anymore. But sometimes I just want to do that anyway. At least it made the nerves and tissues connect for once before they get broken off again. It's mad but at least that works like an asprin for a headache. Except that I don't like or take asprins. It's just insane. I need some chocolate - my asprin. Just need the pain to remind me I'm alive that's all.

"It's actually pretty amusing to find myself saying this but in all these years, I've never spent it, that is my birthday with anyone special apart from my dear girl friends whom I simply adore spending time together with. I never get bored with 'em company. We always have fun times together. Smashing, be it just not talking. Ha, yeah, a few times I thought I could have spent it with someone special, say a guy. It had always been a near hit. But they just slipped away. Chickens. Well perhaps I did, years ago once, but we were great mates anyway. I miss him! That idiot has the cheek to spite me by being in the country I'd've love most to be in right now! He's got the guts I say, yeah. I wanna visit him if I can. It's gonna be terrific.

"Yeah, someone special to make my "just like any other ordinary day" (b'day) special. I think that might have just happened this year though it felt kinda ordinary. Just this one day for now. Just this one special day. Only that one day. After that, it just sorta vanished, disappeared like magic. Guess that's when things just muddled up anyway. I don't give a damn. Afterall I've already gotten my special day. To think that I could actually let this slip away? I did anyway. But I'm still saying it anyway. I just blew it away. I just did and I don't wanna give a hoot at. But I probably guess I'm thinking otherwise. Yeah, me. No matter what, the only two memories I wanna hang onto will just be those two days. The rest I just shouldn't anyway.

"The two memories. That one of him giving me my special day, shan't put that onto the table now. The other where we first met and for a brief moment felt my heart skipped a beat. That sweater pullover gave my heart that missed beat. Any guy caught wearing that, any guy, has got me right there and then. It's such tragedy. To be killed by a mere striped soft grey and pastel soft pink sweater. God damn it! Never wear that! I don't want me dead again. Hell of a sweater that is. Never wear it unless one can carry it off well.

"I'm hoping for the better weathers to come which I highly doubt for a million. I'm really so sick of trying to bring up this weather topic. I don't wanna but ain't it fun horsing about with this weather shite. Yeah. Just had some chocolate off M&S. Less than 99 calorie in one small bar. How comforting that hell of a chocolate bar is.

"I must have been going on and on talking like this kinda no arse shite talk. Ha... boy do I love to amuse myself talking like this right now. I swear I'm laughing. I am, but not the loud sorta, or rolling on the floor grabbing my belly and laughing sorta. None of that. Just a short "Ha" or two. Okay and throw in a few giggles. I'm still a girl somewhere no matter what. I have skirts, tonnes, but I'm always in jeans anyway. Blame it on this freaking weather. Well it's this book I borrowed off a friend that I'm reading now. The Catcher in the Rye. Hell American that feels. It's very mental. I'm half way through though. It just kills me in its own way. I figured I would give it a shot by writing something like it in my own way. Except the fact that this sucks probably. But it's kinda fun."

So If you've enjoyed to this piece of crazy shite, you might probably want to go pick up this book I'm telling ya about. Now, how about that? But beware for the book can be pretty mental. Ha... my deed's done. Think I need something else to feed my mind...

He came down off the shower ledge and came in the room. "Hi," he said. He always said it like he was terrifically bored or terrifically tired. He didn't want you to think he was visiting you or anything. He wanted you to think he'd come in by mistake, for God's sake.

"Hi," I said, but I didn't look up from my book. With a guy like Ackley, if you look up from your book you were a goner. You were a goner anyway, but not as quick if you didn't look up right away.

- The Catcher in the Rye, J.D. Salinger

Check out a review I chance upon for The Catcher in the Rye. Holy shite. Smashing.
http://www.tmtm.com/sides/catcher.html

P.S. Am I heading somewhat towards the way like how Holden Caulfield is in the book? Surrounded by phonies too? Ha ha ha...

Life in mono...

2006-05-10T22:15:00.000+01:00

It's been quite a while hasn't it?

It's amazing how fast time flies when one is kept occupied. Alot has been going on about and around me since 2006. It's keeping me occupied but at the same time draining and sucking the energy out of me. New job, new responsibilities, new colleagues, new people, new friends, new travels, new clothes.. tsk tsk... I feel so faded and jaded. How I wish I could express myself like before, freely and be more lively. Pretty tough as I'm feeling pretty numb to just about everything, just name it. Feel as if I were a zombie without any soul. But still there's so many things waiting for me to do and to try and to achieve. No matter what, I'll go on. No soul but yes spirit. Hee hee hee... I figured I'll need more rest or sleep to nurse 'em back. Perhaps a hundred years would be about right. Won't it? Hahaha...

As for now, I'm hoping for the better weather to come upon us. At least that would keep me happy. Yes, you can say that I am quite easily contented. It shouldn't be hard. Why should one try to make things difficult for oneself in order to be happy? Hmmm, but at the same time I think I quite enjoy seeing and making myself sad and take pity on myself. Am I not the only one? I want things to go my way! But it doesn't work that way all the time. Thank you.

I wonder what sort of person have I come to become after this (soon to come) one year away from home, living in the UK? For the better definately! Haha... but it's always very nice to hear from family and friends what have I become. I can be pretty obsess with myself. Self-centered! Narcissism! So what have those who have known me for ages got to say about me then and now? That I've sort of turned mellow? Less lively or bouncy? Tad more serious? Tell me tell me...

Bet you can tell the diff from my past and present blogs anyway. I'm like a case study. Woo hooo... Aite. That's all for now. I'm done with blogging to keep my moodiness at bay.

Ci Vediamo (cya in Italian)

I'm hoping to learn Italian from me housemates, but progress is very bad.

Well well well...

2006-04-05T20:09:00.000+01:00

What can I say?
Hell a long time it has been.
For sure that is.
How have I been?
Busy as a bee.
Oh dear, rhymes am I talking in?
I'm afraid not for lame I've always been.
Hahaha....
Lazy is the word I'd say.
Hammer me right hard on my head.
Catch me that is if you can.
Aite, stay tune for more.
If paitence is what you've got.
Who knows this blog be dated once more.

Silly poem by silly me. Grinz. Love it? Neh... I guess not.

Happy Chinese New Year!

2006-01-29T23:09:00.000Z

I guess it's been a really long time since I last blog in here. First and foremost, I wanna wish all a very Happy Chinese New Year. May the coming of the new year bring everyone happiniess and good fortune. :) I'm sure things will definately be looking more positive for all in the Dog year of the lunar calendar. Things will be turning for the better. Trust me. If not just embrace it with a smile come what may. Darn, have I gone insane with my thoughts. Hahaha...

I'm still in London. Without my family with me to celebrate this Lunar New Year, but fret not for I still have friends here to keep me company. It's getting cold here but somehow I'm getting pretty used to this weather. Imagine wearing a skirt under your winter coat in such harsh weather condition. Thank God we ain't like Moscow, -30 degrees. Man, that's what we should call cold. Think I'm gonna die of heat when I get back home to sunny old Singapore soon. Can't wait to head off to the beach. Roller blading by the coast too! I miss the sensation of the wind blowing across your face, giving you the carefree feeling. Ah! How nice. Mind you, the wind here in winter, no no no, you ain't want it come blowing into your face. Ha!

Ha! Alright, guess I'm being pretty nonsensical. When had I always been sane anyway. Oh dear... Buah ha ha ha!!!

Amsterdam - All that was taken has been lost!

2005-12-05T12:00:00.000Z

I'm so bloody hell damn sad now! Wails! All the photos that I've snapped on my camera has been formatted away! Boo Hoo hoo!!! I'm so messed up now. £"$"$%"£$

Thinking that I've backed up my photos onto my desktop, I went to reformat my memory card to clear space for more photos in my coming trip to Germany the very next day. Normally I won't have done the formatting until I'm sure I've gotten my stuffs backed up. But this time, think I'm tired out from the straining overnight journey back home from Amsterdam that my mind must have been in space and I didn't realise what I was doing. (too much weed smoking maybe? HA) Imagine getting off the bus for the customs check 3 times flat in the cold wee morning hours!!! Noisy passengers and cramp seat through out 12 hours or more! What's worse, I've gotta get to work right after arriving in the coach station in the morning. Squeezing into the tube with the rush hour crowds with my baggages. :(

ARGH!!!! I just can't believe that this happened! My lovely photos of me in Amsterdam! The wooden clogs, the windmills, the fishing villages, the trams, the building, the canal boat ride, the people, the Heineken Brewery! ALL GONE! Boo Hoo HOoO!!! I'm so inconsolable now! I want my photos back!!! Sobs! Wails! ARGH!!!!

Anyway Amsterdam was nice apart from the fact of my deleted photos, we had a great time. Ate a lot of free cheese in Holland. :) But I'm still very sad now that I want to cry it all out! All the frustration just engulfs me up. Sobs. Miserable! I want to go back to Amsterdam again to get back what I've lost! It's lovely there. :(

The Land of Madame Tussauds

2005-12-01T12:59:00.000Z

Brother in London

2005-12-01T12:48:00.000Z

My brother flew over from Singapore to London for a visit on the 25th Nov. He's gonna be here for a near month long holiday in the UK and Europe. I can't say winter's the best time to be here for such a long holiday as it's freezing cold and short day lights. But this is the only long time he could get away for such a long holiday, so guess we might as well just make do with that for now.

Pity I didn't have much leaves left to show him around London as much as I would like to. So the first few days (he arrived on a Friday late morning), I tortured him and made him walk like mad and tire him out. *grins* On his arrival day, I brought him to the main areas of the city - Borough Market, Tate Modern (Art Museum) , Covent Garden, Tottenham Court Road, Leicester Sq, Soho (China Town), Piccadilly Circus. And for his first weekend, we went to Portebello (Flea) Market, Camden Town and Madame Tussauds. We even went to the Tower of London. Gee... That's really some kinda holiday isn't it? Poor brother of mine. Haha... But there's still so much more in London that he has yet to see - there's London Eye, Buckingham Palace, Hyde Park, Spitalfields (Flea) Market, etc.! And there's isn't much days/time left since every weekend we'll be away in some parts of Europe for our holiday. And I have to work. Bummer. But to date, he's managed to get the some other museums - V&A, Science Museum, Natural History - on his own (while I'm at work). Hope he's having fun, apart from the icy winter and frosty fingers from the cold.

And for the first time in the 6 months here, I actually got down to trying to cook some RICE on my own for our meals. Haha... Also attempted whipping up more oriental chinese style meals for our dinner (otherwise I normally settle for salad, sandwiches, potatoes or pasta at home). Straining/tiring but fun to eat what I cooked and it gets better with practise. Haha! Now I know how hard it is for Mums to plan and cook dinners.

This coming weekend we're gonna be in Amsterdam, then Nuremberg, Germany the week after followed by Barcelona next. Woo Hoo!! It's gonna be fun and hell tiring. Can't wait!

Blackpool, Lancashire

2005-11-23T15:41:00.000Z

After being in London for near 6 months, I decided that I'm missing the beach big time. Hence a mini weekend get away by the beach in Blackpool I went (19th - 20th Nov). The weekend I was so looking forward to didn't turn out a great one afterall. First, I nearly missed catching my train to Blackpool due to failed tube signals in London. Second, a friend whom I was suppose to meet there played me out bloody hell big time. Cursed and swear. #@£*% There I was left to take in the sights of the pretty beach on my own in the freaking cold. Third, I decided to change my route back to London earlier on Sunday. I decided to opt travelling via Manchester Piccadilly to London at Preston, instead of from Preston direct to London. However the train before mine had failed and had to be pull off the track, thus causing delay again. Bummer. And that was not all! Forth, the train I was to embark at Manchester Piccadilly had faults too. Caught a glimsp of Manchester though, it seem like a nice city for a short weekend visit next time. Anyway I ended up reaching home past midnight, much later than I was suppose to have been. I was so darn tired. Gee, tell me about the word lucky again please. I guess that's UK for you. Get use to it. Not everything can be trusted. Ha.

Oh well, all else is not fail, I managed to have an alright time in Blackpool. Had a nice time sitting by and walking along the beach on both days. I love the beach. Being away from home had taken away the lovely beach from me which I've so taken for granted. So there I sat watching the beautiful dusk, witnessing the round red ball of fire slowly disappearing beneath the sea. Hell beautiful and hell freezing cold. Ha, darn, I left my gloves in my hotel room. Anyway I couldn't help smiling at the sight, the sky was so pretty, amazing red and purple. :)

When I get home next year, I'm definately gonna head to the beach! I'm gonna drag my friends with me to the beaches, parks, coast! I'm gonna sit on the swings in the park! Yay! I can't wait! Gotta get back to Sentosa with the vball guys for our beach games! Getting hit by the volleyball, splashing and dunking each other in the sea. Woopie! And yep, I'm definately gonna get me blades and go blading for hours and hours by the coast. Get ready for some blading sprinting when I'm back! No Blades No Angela! Woo la la!

Okay, back to Blackpool. I decided to head up the Blackpool Tower. Why not since I'm there since I might not get back there again. It was there that I gotten to befriend a fellow asian who's from Malaysia, my first random friend gotten known off the streets. Guess travelling alone can be pretty fun. Pity the clear blue sky was grey and misty when we were up in the tower. Nevertheless the view was magnificent. Then we both went about the rest of the day walking by the beach and helping each other snap pictures of ourselves. I think - apart from the time I spend watching TV and sleeping in my hotel room - I've spent 70% of my time in Blackpool by the beach. Lovely. Being able to hear the waves gentle movements soothes and calms me. I just love the beach!

Now I've been to the beaches in Brighton and Blackpool, I can't wait for my brother to come visit. We're gonna get to Barcelona in December. Yay! Another beach! Heard it's lovely there. May it hold true in the winter December. At least I have someone to share the lovely beach with once more. Wonder which beach after next?

Color Quiz Test Results

2005-11-23T15:15:00.000Z

Angela's Existing Situation

Works well in cooperation with others but is disinclined to take the leading role. Needs a personal life of mutual understanding and freedom from discord.

Angela's Stress Sources

Wants to overcome a feeling of emptiness and of separation from others. Believes that life still has far more to offer and that she may miss her share of experiences if she fails to make the best use of every opportunity. She therefore pursues her objectives with a fierce intensity and commits herself deeply and readily. Feels herself to be completely competent in any field in which she engages, and can sometimes be considered by others to be interfering or meddlesome.

Angela's Restrained Characteristics

-- HAHAHAHAHA Laughing My Arse Off!

Angela's Desired Objective

Needs recognition. Ambitious, wants to impress and be looked up to, to be both popular and admired. Seeks to bridge the gap which she feels separates her from others.

Angela's Actual Problem

Afraid that she may be prevented from achieving the things she wants and therefore demands that others should recognize her right to them.

Angela's Actual Problem #2

Strongly resists outside influence and any interference with her freedom to make her own decisions and plans. Works to establish and strengthen her own position.

Take the ColorQuiz yourself right now!

Pictcha!

2005-11-12T12:46:00.000Z

Some more pictcha montages brought to you by me!
Will try to keep more of em' coming in, so stay tune!
A pictcha speaks a thousand words!

Phantom of the Opera with Trixy, 17th September

Thames River Festival with Trixy, 18th September

London Design Festival with Priska, 25th September

{Spans from 15th to 30th September}

Brighton with Yang Yang, 22nd - 24th October

Housemates, Colleagues and their Friends in the 6 months
That's not all!

Random blabbering

2005-11-11T23:49:00.000Z

It's been a really long time since I last blog in here. I'm starting to fade away from my blog. I've started to detach myself away that I'm starting to feel numb to all around me. Hmm. I'm even starting to sound nonsensical.

Yes, it's been a long time I've been away from home, it's my 6th month here in London. For the first time in my life, I've never been living away from my family and friends for so long! Though we still try to keep in contact through msn or emails, the feeling's never right. We are still thousand miles apart. Nothing's gonna change that. I can't say I don't totally enjoy being here, working and meeting new people and learning new stuffs about the world out there. Somehow home will always get to you, especially when all the fun goes to bed and loneliness ties you down. Heh.

Many things happen in the past 6 months. I'm really glad that I'm here and for the umteen times I can't believe I'm actually here. Man! So what is my point?! Heh

Weather's turning colder. It's really a test to my coldness endurance. Let's see who wins, the winter or I. We'll wait and see, the coldest day is yet to come! Always a good reason to shop for new warm clothes. I really worry for my little luggage. How am I gonna bring back the load I already have brought and bought. If I do really come back to the UK again next year, be sure to remind me just to bring an empty luggage so I can buy all the pretty outfits here and not worry I won't have no space in me baggage. Yeah!

This is really random blabbering. Cause? Too long of no constant blogging. Heh.

You know what, I like talking to myself when I'm alone walking on the streets. No, not streets filled with people, that's gonna make me weird. Just thinking aloud while I'm walking alone in a deserted street, like on my way home from the tube station. Shhh, don't go telling others about my queer habit.

Though I now have all the freedom in the world away from home, it's never ever gonna beat the freedom I dearly enjoy when I'm blading out in the parks back home. The taste of freedom in the wind brushing against your bare skin. Think that's the best feeling in the world - freedom! Blading along with the wind blowing against your face, I simply love that feeling. I love being by the beach or coast too, looking at the waves hitting against the shore or rocks. It soothes and calms and heals you. I just can't wait to go to the beach! I just can't wait to be blading again! Pray I do not fall and hurt myself and get all those nasty scars. Heh. I'm gonna go sit by the beach all day long! Looking out in the the vastness and think aloud! Yeah! Heh.

Mind ya the wind can be nasty here when it's winter. Yes, I've made claims that I love the wind blowing into my face, but this? We'll see what I have to say again once I had enough of the chills against me pretty face. Heh.

Scotland and Nottinghill Carnival

2005-09-22T22:30:00.000+01:00

August has been a pretty good if not broke month for me. It’s supposed to be summer and I’m glad I did something about it!

Together with a friend, Edward, and his brother, Edwin - I call them the Ed Brothers - we went to Scotland for 5 days from the 22nd August. It had been a pretty last minute holiday planning. This is my first backpacking experience ever. Living in a backpackers hostel, sleeping in a mixed dorm for my stay in Edinburgh. A pretty interesting experience, sharing a room with so many people from around the world. Managed to catch a little chat with one of them, a girl from California. Not much luck with the rest as they aren’t in the room most of the time, if not asleep (and vice versa).

On the 2nd day we took a day trip up to Glencoe, the Highlands and Loch Ness. It’s really very lovely with the mountains, castles and Lochs. So much greens about. Ah yesh! Pity I couldn’t spot Nessie, the Loch Ness monster. Oh well. On the forth day, we made a quick short trip to Glasgow, spending a couple of hours there. The Scottish accent was really strong in Glasgow. There’s wasn’t really much there, it felt more like London as compared to Edinbugrh. But I do love The Lighthouse, Glasgow, one of Europe's largest architecture, design centres and exhibition spaces. Makes me wanna design! Hahaha…Very inspirational indeed.

Edinburgh was lovely, but much much colder than in London, especially when the strong wind blows. The first day was lovely weather, the remaining were showery and grey, and occasionally sunny. We went there for the Edinburgh Festival, the buskering on the High Street drawing crowds all about. We hopped from one busker to the other. It really reminds me of the Buskers Festival we have back home every November. It’s very vibrant, with people on the streets trying to promote their plays and stuffs. We caught comedies, dance, theater play, and orchestra. Awesome! It’s really arty and cool, loved the festival! A must do for those who want to visit Scotland in August. The Scots have such great sense of humour too.

Then it was back to London once more. It was bank Holiday on 29th August, Monday. There’s a Notting Hill Carnival on the 28th and 29th. Lucky for me and Trixy, we have a friend, Nok, just living in Notting Hill area where her place overlooks part of the carnival. The sunny Notting Hill streets were packed with hot crowds, loads of people, Jamaican,/Brazilian food and music! Woah! People were dancing and eating and drinking in the streets. We have to push our way about the crowds. Pity I’d forgotten to bring my main memory card for my camera, if not I could have captured more of the festive carnival.

Oxford, Oxfordshire

2005-08-18T11:32:00.000+01:00

Finally after a near 3 months in London, I made a trip out of London last Saturday with Trixy and some friends. Yay!!! Not too far out, but Oxford was a nice little town. We started the Saturday morning visiting the City Center, walking about admiring the magnificent views of Oxford. Did you know that they shot Harry Potter at some of the locations in Oxford?? We visited the Universities and churches and gardens, pity we have to pay to get in for most which we didnt. But we paid to get up this tower and had a nice time snapping photos from above. Tsk tsk... The weather was great in the morning, however it started turning grey and rained in the afternoon. That was a killer but it didn't daunt our spirits. :)

a month into London

2005-06-23T13:59:00.000+01:00

It's a near month I'm in London since 24th May. "Do you miss home?" Some people/friends I met here and back home that I talked to online were asking me when I was barely in London for long.

Now a month into London, so what's it about that I'm missing from home? Family and friends excluded.

Radio Stations & Music Variety - There's alot more black music here, not that I have anything against them. They are nice.
My PC & broadband! - I miss stoning in front of my PC in the wee hours doing nothing! Hahaha!
Shopping - It's so much cheaper back home!!!!
Authentic Asian Food - I MISS nasi padang!!!! Pineapple rice!!! Some chinese food here don't even taste nor look chinese!!
MRT & SBS/buses - I miss the aircon and speed. It's stuffy in the transport here when the weather gets hot. It's much cheaper back home too!!!
Fruits - Much cheaper! So much more! I want my papaya!
Bed & Pillows & Bloaster - I MISS my baby bloaster!

Ah, but there must be stuffs here that I'm enjoying and liking!

Cherries & Strawberries - It's their season!! Much cheaper too! YUMMY!!!
Pastry, Cakes, Cookies, Desserts! - Simply heaven! Yummylicious! Wide choices! I simply LOVE the carrort cake at one of the cafe at Sloane Square!!!
Marks & Spencer - LOVE it though not cheap! The food! The sandwiches! Best!
Fashion - Dress as you like! So much more shops, varieties, choices! So much much more! Men here dress up more too! Cool~
People - All sorts: weird, funny, scary, cute, charming, cool, interesting, shocking, rude, good, etc. Different mixtures, more than Singapore!
MTVs - Yeah and certain shows too, like Will & Grace, SATC, both sexually hilarious.
Supermarkets & Sandwiches - Too many choices!
SALES/Shopping - Only time when things cost cheaper : sales!
(Flea) Markets, Museums, Parks - Awesome! I'm fascinated by Richmond Park.
Stockings & Boots - Good for the cooler weather. Woo lala! I'm gonna wear those!

So there you go! I dare say I'm still having a great time here, other than the darn HOT weather otherwise perfect. Gimme a few more months before asking me once more. *Grinz*

Hello from London!

2005-05-25T07:40:00.000+01:00

I still can't believe that I'm actually on London ground!! I'm into my 2nd day here already. It's end of spring, but still pretty cold. Can't tell much yet since I've only got here yesterday noon. For the past month in Singapore, life had been really hectic, projects to complete, friends to meet, gatherings to go, stuffs to get and pack, blah blah blah, the list goes on. I was kept busy awake all night till my flight timing in the morning! I didn't had one last chance to sleep on my bed before I flew. That crept on me when I was on the plane. Pity pity. *Chuckles* Oh well...

London's 7 hours behind Singapore. It's morning here now. I woke up pretty early. The sky's already bright and felt like I've slept past the noon. Hahaha... it gets dark here late too. At 9 - 10pm, it's still pretty bright. Cool! But I doubt I'll enjoy winter as much when it comes. Brrrrrrr...

I landed at 12.15pm yesterday. By the time i got out of the customs, it's an hour later. And I had to try get my almost 30kg worth of baggages to my friend's place from the Heathrow Airport right up to Tooting Broadway Station. Phew! And I tell ya, it ain't easy alright! Stairs to climb and tubes to hop on and off. Good thing the peeps here are pretty helpful when I needed some help with my load. By the time I managed to get me and my baggaes in safe pieces to Tooting Broadway, it's already 3pm. Woo hoo~ What a way to go! It wasn't until near 4pm that I met up with my friend for he had something going on and couldn't come sooner. So I stood by the tube entrance looking at the locals, wooo yeah. I really need to get used to living in London. Too many cute guys about for my eyes to feast on. *chuckles*

So I spent my first day getting familiar with my friend's neighbourhood. Then hop on to some busses and tubes and went exploring about for a bit. *Yawns* Pretty tiring since I didn't sleep much on the plane, I tried hard to keep awake in the tubes. I like taking the bus rides. There's more you can see about as compared to the tubes.

Think I'm gonna go get a local number later if possible and some travel passes and get my ass moving about the central London. Hope to see something cheap, maybe like a good winter wear, at the flea marts later if I find one. Haha!

Welcome to London!

Broken Pieces... Pieces of Me...

2005-05-12T01:52:00.000+01:00

It's been a month since me last blog entry. And to think that I ain't got much good news with what I'm about to blog.

I broke my BIG, precious, mirror this morning when I was looking into it. Haha, well, it's not that I'm so ugly that it stunned the mirror and broke it. More like the opposite, too stunned by my beauty. Ha! To think I can still joke about this now. Don't ya just love me to pieces? Haha...

It was almost as tall as I. Wider than I. Easily weighing a few kilograms. Richly brown broad frame with a thin golden lining. Handsome, grand sight. Costing a few hundred bucks. Thick mirror within the pretty frame. Now broken into pieces. Sigh. How clumsy of me to have brought it to such an unglory end. Dead broken. Shattered. Just like my heart. *giggles* Well at least I have the outer frame in its perfect one piece. Perhaps I'll use that to frame a nice piece of art work if any, or I can frame in another new mirror? But I do wonder if a broken mirror bids any bad omen? If there is, I rather not know. Besides that's [the bad omen] not really freaking me out, I'm somewhat feeling indifferent. But it pains my heart that I broke my mirror, now I wont have one to look into every day. Hmm, but my computer seems to be having some probs again. YES! AGAIN! Never ending again! Sigh. To add on to that, I'm behind schdule due to this and many other things that I shan't list. Talking about bad omen eh? Bah! I still ain't freaked out yet! Don't prove me wrong I tell ya!

So how on earth did I break such a BIG mirror? Well, I was resting the mirror against my cupboard. [I didnt had a place to hang my mirror up, so I place it on the floor against my cupboad] Next I was opening another cupboard beside that cupboard [Yes! I have quite a number of cupboards. Vainity]. The cupboard door sorta hit against the side of my mirror, and before I could stop it from sliding off, it hit onto the floor and *PANG* there you go. Ho ho ho... I saw many me in the mirror. Hey that reminds me of a song, Pieces of Me, by Ashlee Simpson

which I kinda like.



Pieces Of Me

On a Monday, I am waiting
Tuesday, I am fading
And by Wednesday, I can't sleep
Then the phone rings, I hear you
And the darkness is a clear view
Cuz you've come to rescue me

Fall... With you, I fall so fast
I can hardly catch my breath, I hope it lasts




[Chorus:]
Ohhhhh
It seems like I can finally rest my head on something real
I like the way that feels
Ohhhhh
It's as if you know me better than I ever knew myself
I love how you can tell
All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me
All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me

I am moody, messy
I get restless, and it's senseless
How you never seem to care

When I'm angry, you listen
Make me happy it's a mission
And you won't stop til I'm there

Fall... Sometimes I fall so fast
When I hit that bottom
Crash, you're all I have



[Chorus:]
Ohhhhh
It seems like I can finally rest my head on something real
I like the way that feels
Ohhhhh
It's as if you known me better than I ever knew myself
I love how you can tell
All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me

How do you know everything I'm about to say?
Am I that obvious?
And if it's written on my face...
I hope it never goes away... yeah

On a Monday, I am waiting
And by Tuesday, I am fading into your arms...
So I can breathe



[Chorus:]
Ohhhhh
It seems like I can finally rest my head on something real
I like the way that feels
Ohhhhh
It's as if you've know me better than I ever knew myself
I love how you can tell
Ohhhhh
I love how you can tell
Ohhhhh
I love how you can tell
All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me
All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me...

MVP - Mitral Valve Prolapse

2005-04-12T09:46:00.000+01:00

What is the mitral valve?
The mitral valve controls the flow of blood between two chambers (or "rooms") of your heart, called the left atrium and the left ventricle. Normally, blood flows only from the atrium to the ventricle. When the heart relaxes in between beats, the two flaps of the mitral valve swing open to let blood flow from the atrium to the ventricle. The flaps normally open only one way.

What is mitral valve prolapse?
If you have mitral valve prolapse, the flaps of the valve don't work well. One of the flaps moves back into the atrium when the heart beats. This can let blood flow from the ventricle back into the atrium.

About 1 in 20 Americans has mitral valve prolapse. People are usually born with it. More women have it than men.

How do I know that I have mitral valve prolapse?
Sometimes people with mitral valve prolapse have symptoms that go along with this condition. Here are some of these symptoms:

Feeling like your heart is racing or is skipping beats
Chest pain that comes now and then
Shortness of breath
Dizziness
Anxiety or panic

Your doctor can find mitral valve prolapse during a regular exam. When listening to your heart with a stethoscope, your doctor may hear a clicking sound. The flap makes the click. If blood is flowing back into the atrium, your doctor will hear a "whooshing" sound. This sound is called a murmur.

To find out how well your valve is working, your doctor may have you get an echocardiogram. The echocardiogram is a special picture of your heart that shows your valve as the blood flows through it. This can help your doctor decide if you need treatment.

How is mitral valve prolapse treated?
Most people with mitral valve prolapse don't need any treatment. In fact, this condition usually has no effect on your health. About 2 of every 100 people with this condition have complications. If your valve is too leaky or if you are having lots of symptoms you may need surgery to fix the valve. You may also have to limit your participation in competitive sports. Ask your doctor if you are in this group.

If your mitral valve prolapse causes chest pain or other symptoms, your doctor might prescribe medicines such as beta blockers to make your symptoms better.

Some people get an infection in the leaky valve when they have surgery or dental work. You might need to take antibiotics before surgery or dental work to prevent this infection. Remind your dentists and doctors that you have mitral valve prolapse so that you can get a prescription for antibiotics before you have surgery or dental work.

Source
familydoctor.org/598.xml

Other Links
www.mvprolapse.com/mvp.html
www.tmc.edu/thi/mvp.html
www.ctds.info/mvp1.html
www.physsportsmed.com/issues/1996/07_96/joy.htm
www.ilovejesus.com/myhome/mcpeg7/MitralValveProlapse.shtml

A birthday just like any other day

2005-04-12T07:22:00.000+01:00

First and foremost, I would like to wish myself a very simple, sweet Happy 24th Birthday!

I just wanna celebrate, or rather spend it like any other normal day. I don't feel anything special about this particular day. The sun still rises in the east, and sets in the west, birds still sings and we still breathe.

Since morning, there had been the usual birthday greetings from friends who cared and remembered. I wanna thank you all. Thank you my lovely friends! Sorry if I never replied, for I just ain't in a right state of mood these days. Peace and solitude are what I wished for the time being. But amongst all those sms, there was one which touched me dearly, bringing me near to tears. It reads,"happy birthday 2 my dearest daughter si han fr papa". That was the first ever b-day sms I received from my dad. Just last night I had a little petty argument with my dad, I ended up giving him the cold shoulder and stop talking to him for my ego and pride has got the better of me.

Nevermind about that. Just now I bought a cake, which is to be shared with my family later tonight at home. Dark Chocolate Truffle. Layers of soft chocolate sponge sandwiched between rich chocolate moussee, topped with a layer of dark cocoa powder. Simply a chocolate-lover's delight! I wanted to get a small one of 500grams, but they were sold out. Even the bigger cake hadn't any left. I ended up getting a smaller heart-shaped cake. Cute. It's the thoughts that count, right? Hmm, seems like there must be many others who have their birthdays today too, for it's strange to see such little amount of cakes left from the shop I bought mine at. I wonder who could they be...

Hmm... maybe I should go learn how to bake some really swell cakes and open a shop or cafe and sell 'em. Cool! Swell! I wonder on...

This aint the actual cake though