a box of dark truffles

YIPPY!

I found this box of dark truffles tucked away in my drawers at work.

But here's the catch - expiry date 01 Dec 2007

GREED overcame me.

I popped one into my mouth, still taste fine. However after a few seconds...

GEE... I think I start feeling hyper!

I feel like jumping about, okay, I'm exaggerating. But my heart sure feels like it's racing!

OKAY! That's it! I'm throwing those dark truffles away!

Just not ready for work

Woke up this morning, bad hair day, but that's always the case when I wash my hair the night before. Think I've grown too attached to my hair straighteners. Bad.

I couldn't find my pink sneakers...
when they should be on the shoe rack or shoe cupboard.

I couldn't find my fav metal watch...
when it should be sitting on the shelves.

I couldn't find my keys...
when they should have been in my bag for work.

I couldn't find my coupons...
when they should be somewhere on the shelves.

One stop away on the tube. I finally remembered I had my keys by the kitchen back door and I hadn't lock it! Blimey, I had to take a detour back. Thank goodness all was fine when I got home. Rushing about in the morning isn't nice. I'll have to look for my other stuffs when I'm home.

I think the stock market is facing bigger problems than mine today.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/business/7201812.stm

needs

I NEED to get to a beach!
I NEED to get my feet onto a snowboard!
I NEED to get roller blading again!

I NEED that sensation of the freedom of the wind blowing into my face as:

I sit by the waves;
I board on the snow;
I blade past the crowd;

A moody phase then and again

I think I'm a rather insecure person when it comes to many things, even when in a relationship. If I'm not getting enough attention my mind may begin to start wandering into thinking. I try to block the negative feelings out. Somehow in order to do that I would turn moody, into a I-just-wanna-be-left-alone mode for no reason; start letting that loneliness feeling take over and gain control.

Is this how it's supposed to be? I think it's rather unhealthy but I'm not really sure what should I do. It's been some time since this feeling took over this way, or perhaps not.

It'll be nice to be sitting by the window with a mug of hot drink, hot choco maybe in this instance, sipping while looking out at the stars shinning in the sky. Or perhaps sitting by a cafe window, reading a nice book while enjoying the hot drink. Sad yet soothing music playing in the background.

Dream hairstyles

Here's a quick preview to my current hairstyle.

- front view -

My stoopid smile.
Not quite sure I like the front view of my hairstyle.

- side view [right] -

I like the sides better. Choppy layers.

- side view [left] -

I like how the fringe flow to the sides.

And here're 2 hairstyles that I like.

- hairstyle #1 -

I'm trying to grow my hair long and hopefully to be able to get a similiar cut like this.
One that's just as funky and will look good on me.

- hairstyle #2 -

I really liked how this girl here is able to carry off this funky style, she's so cool!
Or rather the hairstyle is so cool!
This may not suit me. I have a rather long face.

The New Year

The sky's clear blue out of my window. The leaves that used to block the lovely view of the sky had gone to visit the ground (month before). All left were but bare tree branches. Winter can still be beautiful. I'm smiling. I feel relax. The sun is shinning and that makes my heart beams. Noon.

It's nice to finally have a quiet time to myself. I've spent most of my December away. I've been rushing about like crazy meeting friends during my 3 weeks holiday (December 2007) back home (in Singapore). It's a pity that time is always never enough when you're having so much fun hanging out with them. I had mixed emotions when I left the airport this New Year's day to fly back to London again. In a way I wished I could stay in Singapore but yet in another unknown way I know my time in London's not up yet. Lord knows how long before I get to settle down back home. I think my dad is definately looking forward to that day. He misses me I could tell. I remembered him telling me "You must send me emails (you've stopped doing it)!"

I never really had breakfast with my folks before. Gosh, I don't even know if we ever had one together before! It was nice to have breakfast together (at the airport). It was brief as I had to catch my flight but it was nice (if only we could do that more).

I waved goodbye to them after I passed through the gate.

I waved goodbye to them after I got my passport checked.

I waved goodbye to them after I walked past the passport check point.

I waved goodbye to them one last time as I disappeared into the bustling departure hall.

Waving away the year 2007 that's past and waving to the new 2008. But never waving away family and friends dear to me back home.

Look Ma! I'm on a Magazine cover!

Create Fake Magazine Covers with your own picture at MagMyPic.com

Subscribe to People Magazine at a 37% discount!

November thoughts

I realised that it's finally autumn as I caught a glimpse of the first tree turning orange this morning. It's been 3 monthish since I've moved. My old neighbourhood is always surrounded by bountiful greenery as compared to my current address. Journey to work via the underground (in new area) does not allow me the privilege of any scenery. Then the remaining journey to the office offers no help to any greenery either. No wonder it didn't dawn upon me that autumn is already knocking on my door. It's been rather cold this October, at least I won't be around this cold X'mas. Can't wait to be back home to chill in the hot Summer.

It's amazing how fast time flies and barely 6 weeks more I'm to fly home again to be reunited with family and friends. I'm looking forward to the day but I can't say I'm prepared to yet. There're still so much to sort out back in the UK - work, "freelance", financial suitation and pressies to buy! Packing too! I feel so messy and disorganised. Sigh. There's just not enough time for me to idle and laze about!

my equation

I guess it's been quite a while yeah? A lot has happened, I'm still the same old same old. A girl waiting for her prince in the fancy little world of her own. I seriously do not know what's wrong with me! Why am I so protective of myself - on one hand closing up and not wanting to get hurt and yet on the other hand getting my heart broken by all the wrong choices of men. I seriously do not understand myself. Even though I've told myself not to run away, and there I go sprinting off. I'm really tired and it really has taken a toll on life and work which is no good at all. Totally not a good sign. But I do not know how to stop this and get myself out of it. I've sunk so deep in that it's become part of me. To be living without it is like losing a part of me. Sigh. Terrible. If possible I wanna take a time off and go blading by the coast back home again; sitting by the beach and have all the time in the world to think about things and myself. But would I really have such a time? I'm always busy running about like a mad woman.

I tried but I failed. I do not know how to communitcate. I seriously have to forget about POF totally. Would a guy not want to be in contact with a girl he could grow to fancy and know? My equation for knowing if the guy can be someone potential may have been proven wrongly here then.

POTENTIAL GUY = HAPPY + COMFORTABLE (when together with)

That's my equation. I must say I just realised there's more to the equation than it seems. This equation is true if you want to know if a particular guy can be someone potential. But here's when the extra bit comes into the whole equation.

AFFIRMATIVE POTENTIAL GUY = HAPPY + COMFORTABLE (when together with) X 2 WAY TRAFFIC

It takes two hands to clap. Why haven't I remembered! So what if I'm really feeling happy and comfortable and able to be myself with POF? I've tried clapping but he's not voluntarily returning the clap. That's when it is time to let go! Past experiences have taught me to try learn taking it easy 'cause there's really no point getting all upset about. And I didn't even cry over it - tears won't flow out. I'm just numbed. Amazing. But still it had been a great time and lovely memory. 不在乎天长地久,只在乎曾经拥有.对吗?


I think I'm more upset over the fact that I can't find my CDs of photos of the last few years!!!!! All my photos with close friends and family and travels!!!!! Triple sigh. Now that's what I call depressing, more upsetting and heart breaking to think about rather than over some guy. Sigh.

Left or right?

Look at the below image for a minute or 2.
Is she turning clockwise or anticlockwise?

For me, at first glance it was clockwise, then after a minute or more, it began to turn anticlockwise. Then after a moment it's back to clockwise again. Woah, I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me. But after a period of time, it seems to set turning in the same clockwise direction. But if I were to try concentrate really really really hard I think I can try make it turn anticlockwise. Weird.

Well... An ex-colleague shared this test with me. However the test result is in portuguese. He said he only sees it turning clockwise-anticolckwise-clockwise and had been clockwise ever since, whereas his girlfriend sees it turning antoclockwise only. I tested this out on 2 other colleagues. Both have different results. One sees it turning clockwise only and the other anticlockwise only. Guess it's cool for one to be able to see it turn for both directions.

So what direction is it for you? Post it in my comments! I would love to know.

- TEST RESULT -

PORTUGUESE VERSION
"Supostamente, se você estiver estimulando mais o lado racional do cérebro (o esquerdo) você verá a mulher girando no sentido anti-horário. Caso esteja utilizando mais o lado direito do cérebro, ligado a subjetividade, ela gira no sentido horário."

TRANSLATED VERSION (from dictionary.com)
Supposedly, if you will be stimulating more the rational side of the brain (the left) you you will see the woman turning in the counter-clockwise direction. In case that it is using more the right side of the brain, on the subjectivity, it turns in the clockwise one.

MY TRANLATION FROM ABOVE
Suppose if you see the woman turning anti-clockwise, it stimulates your rational side of the brain (left brain). And if you see it turning clockwise, for most people would, you are using more of the right side of the brain.

---

Test your brain and see how much of a left or right side person are you. For me I'm very balanced, 46% left, 46% right - perhaps that's why I always have the problem of contradicting myself.
http://similarminds.com/brain.html

LEFT BRAIN FUNCTIONS
uses logic
detail oriented
facts rule
words and language
present and past
math and science
can comprehend
knowing
acknowledges
order/pattern perception
knows object name
reality based
forms strategies
practical
safe

RIGHT BRAIN FUNCTIONS
uses feeling
"big picture" oriented
imagination rules
symbols and images
present and future
philosophy & religion
can "get it" (i.e. meaning)
believes
appreciates
spatial perception
knows object function
fantasy based
presents possibilities
impetuous
risk taking

Left and Right brain functions source:
http://www.viewzone.com/bicam.html
- go read or find out more!

giving up

I hate to think that giving up is the better option out!

I do not like to give in to giving up!

lost interest in...

I was briefly catching up with an ex-colleague online. One topic led to another. From him sharing a flat with his girlfriend to his sister giving birth soon to children to relationships.

And so part of the conversation went on like this...

Dan: so on that matter are you still single??
Pea: yep still am and I believe will still be for quite a long while
Dan: that's no good, so haven't met anyone lately then?
Pea: I just got to know a guy but don't think he seems very interested
Dan: that's no good
Pea: this year I got to know a few others but I'm just not interested. I can't seem to bring myself to want to get involve with any guy
Dan: Ang, are you sounding like a possible lesbian... lol
Pea: haha and I'm not interested in women either
Dan: well that's no good... lol... you need something just don't know what
Pea: I need to go to a beach!
Dan: well you'll be going home for your break, so you can show your body off in a bikini at the beach
Pea: yeah I suppose you're right. I don't know what's it I need yet hence why the no interest for now

Guess I'll know when the time is ripe then. I'm still waiting on my vine to ripe. Or you can say the right guy's not come by to sweep me off my feet yet. He'll need a very BIG broom then. hahahaa....

3 years plan

Woo Hoo!!!

I finally received my UK driving license today in the post! (Psst, however my UK license start date is just a day difference from my SG start date, drats, would have been perfect if both had the same date!)

Yippy, now it's time to aim for a car! But first I'll have to clear my debts and spend less and save up for the car!

Well my 3 year plan for now is very simple, just 3 things on the list for now:
1] to own a car in London
2] to be able to speak french fluently (well... at this rate I'm going...)
3] to be able to buy my own property in London

*smirks* Let's all wait and see then. 3 years!

Well I know that last point seems very highly impossible, SO I'm listing this as backup (which shouldn't be too hard):

3] to be able to know how to snowboard!


I'm not being materialistic mind ya. Why I'm aiming for these is because:

1] I want to have my own car to be able to drive to IKEA to buy stuffs that would need the help of a car to bring home. To drive about as and when I like over the weekends mainly. I can drive to the beach. I can make short road trips. It's like a freedom!

2] I took up french because my Switzerland trip early this year motivated me so. I wanted to pick up snowboarding but took up french first so if I were to go to France or Switzerland again I can speak to the people in french. Silly but true.

3] I want a place I can call home in London! No more worrying if I can make holes in the walls just so I can hang mirrors or put up pictures! I can decorate the place however I want it to! This can be considered as a kinda investment too!

and of course:

3] I'll never be able to get a change at snowboarding when I'm back in sunny Singapore, summer all year round. Need I explain more?

Silly things a girl will do for the sun...

What do you know. That girl is me.

London being London and such, for it to have a sunny summer-like weekend is quite a rare sight indeed here in the September months. Not wanting to admit that Summer has abandoned us, I decided to challenge the Sunny Sunday afternoon to give me my well deserved tan! So silly me sat in the back garden clad in a tube dress trying to get my tan. Unfortunately Cold Autumn Wind decided to pay Warm Summer Sun a visit. Both cold and hot under the open sky for an hour ended up with me having the Cold Flu as a guest now.

One of the many silly things I do. I wonder what next...

Annoyance

I'm trying to keep cool and calm myself down; composing myself to look at things positively and telling myself I can do it!

Work is just getting annoying with different people attacking me from both sides, wanting this and that done along side with the tight deadlines juggling in my hands. Is this how it is like out there for everyone else too? Annoying isn't it. I want to get work done but it's simply so hard to concentrate if they keep attacking you. I think I need to come up with a strategy to better cope with this.

First, I'll have to get proper amount of sleep each night! Second, stop working over time and go home and stop thinking about work at home and rest and concentrate on my french homework and other tasks out of work. Third, always keep my cool and try not to get side track by every request! Tsk tsk...