Tears of Joy

Norah Jone's "Don't know why" is playing in the background. I like having her music to chill out to. I'm in a mellow mood now. Calm. Smiling to the soothing music (only to be ending up sobbing later on down the blog as I blogged). The past month or so had been quite a nightmare, I had a load on my mind and they still are. Things have been rather too much to bear. I feel worn out. However I'm trying to relax and assure myself that everything will be alright if I take it a step at a time. I can be brave and strong again if I really try hard enough. Where has the old Angela gone to? I need her back!

Earlier on I stayed back late at work, not to do over time on a Friday night but instead to chat with my veggie friends, Potatoe (Trixy), Mushroom (Joy) and Aubergine (Adeline). Unfortunately Winter Melon (Syndy) couldn't be present. Oh man, how much I've missed the girls! And it's been ages since we last had a group chat like this online together. We're all over the world now. It was really great catching up and listening to each others lives and sharing experiences like how we would normally do at our many past gatherings. Guess internet's the best cyber hangout place for now. Till we all meet again to be able to see each other smile and laughing together, I'll be waiting, looking forward to that one day. I miss my good old veggie babes. Definately. Absolutely. Yes. It makes me sad not being able to hang out with them.

Last night I was looking at photos from Joy's trip with her boyfriend and his family in Orlando. They looked happy. She looking so happy just brought tears of Joy (pun intended) to my eyes. I'm so happy for her and yet so sad because it suddenly brought back fond memories of those happy times we had hanging out together since our polytechnic days to when we last met up back home. Oh my, and it just dawn upon me that it's exactly a decade this July that we've known each other. How time flies. How mocking life can be. I'm glad we are still in contact with one another though being thousand of miles apart.

Perhaps I'm the sort of emotional type. Getting worked up easily. I had a chat with Joy on skype while I was walking to Boots at Piccadilly Circus to get some eye gel after getting off work. The moment I heard Joy's voice, I couldn't keep it within me and I started crying softly whilst dodging people's gazes on the street. I kept repeating in mandarin "I miss you so much!" while trying to hold back my tears. It's great to be hearing her voice again and to be chatting and be myself again (when with her).

I don't know why but I'd been feeling rather homesick lately. Guess it must be the stress, and not being able to have my close friends with me in times of my need to have their ears and shoulders to borrow for comfort depresses me even more. It's not easy being a foreigner. I supposed.