Last day of the year...

It's finally a year coming soon to an end. 2006 has been quite a year for me with it's up and down. But it's been fun as well as sad. Anyway I'm looking forward to 2007. I'm sure it's gonna be an even better year than the previous. It's gonna be very exciting too! I'm going home for Chinese New Year (ANG BAOS!!) I'm gonna find out whether or not I'll be getting to stay on in the UK once the work permit/entrance clearance visa applications get through. Otherwise it's gonna be adjustments back home to SG. Travelling more hopefully (depending on my suitation).

So what's a new year without any new year's resolutions? Without further ado...

New Year Resolutions?
1] Try not to be so forgetful
2] Try save up more and spend less unnecessarily
3] Try catching up more with friends in SG
4] Try blogging more
5] Try eat less junk food!

[Trying to keep it minimal and achievable]

So ways to combat failing the resolutions?
1] Keep a To Do list whenever necessary, will use a journal specifically for this only
2] Not to go overboard spending especially when SALES are up every now and then, and aso keep to a financial budget
3] Make an effort to email/mail/msn them more (if I'm still gonna be in UK)
4] GET BROADBAND!
5] Control my diet and eat more greens & cook more greens

[Hopefully these would help]

7 days of Christmas

12 days of Christmas 7 days of Christmas

On the 1st day of Christmas,
I had Italian company at home and lovely Italian meal for dinner.

On the 2nd day of Christmas,
I baked lovely chocolate chips cookies for all at home and I ate many.

On the 3rd day of Christmas,
I went to Natural History Museum and walked about fascinated like a kid.

On the 4th day of Christmas,
I had a totally awesome haircut and we all liked it.

On the 5th day of Christmas,
I went shopping for pressies for myself and home and I went bonkers.

On the 6th day of Christmas,
I visited some friends and we had great times together.

On the 7th day of Christmas,
I and few DMD juniors in UK went countdown to the New Year by the River Thames and it's nice hanging out with SG company.

hair to a new begining

Should I cut my long hair short? Though painstakingly I've tried my best to grow it as long as possible, with great effort.

I've had it for 3 years now. Perhaps it's time for a change? Cutting it short to signify a cut from the past and moving on? A new cut for a new start to the 2007?

moving on...

Finally after months of cruel uncertainties, I manage to brace up the courage to end it. I believe it will take me quite a time before I can look him in the eye as friends again. It never will be a happy ending from the start. But there hasn't a begining to begin with. Things people foolishly fall into for being the innocent victim of loneliness. I'm glad I've decided to stop the prey from devouring me away. A fresh start for a fresh 2007 soon to come. Before that, Merry Christmas to me.

I MISS THE BEACH...

Going home

I wonder how is it like to be walking along the streets in Singapore again. Having the once so familiar paths beneath my feet again, under the sunny hot sun. Looking at a vibrant night scene picture of the Singapore River with Boat Quay and Raffles Place in it, I must say it triggers something within me that tells me Singapore is waiting for me to be home again.

Come walk along all the familiar roads and
taste all the familiar air and happenings.

I wonder how does it feel like to be back home again. I shall embrace Singapore with warm open arms once more for a few week during my trip home in time to come. Soon. Paitence!

The cow got to visit...

Places I want to showed the Cow, things I want the Cow to tasted/experienced :

1. Krispy Kream Donuts - the best donuts ever - ticked (best donut ever agreed)
   
2. Knightsbridge - eating Krispy Kream Donuts in Knightsbridge - ticked (best place with freshest made donuts)
   
3. Portobello Market - on a Saturday morning - ticked (shopaholics in action!)
   
4. Camden Town - look at another side of Britian - ticked (cow said Portobello was FAV!)
   
5. Piccadilly Circus/Leicester Square - the area where I work at - ticked
6. Stockpot - a place to order food from british menu - ticked (said nice food but a bit salty)
7. The Wishing Well - great 3 course meal for £7.95 - ticked (good ambience for long chats and catching up)
   
8. Oxford Circus/Bond Street - just like Orchard Road back home - 1/2 ticked (only a very small bit of Oxford circus)
9. Covent Garden - look at some buskers - ticked (3 times within the first day!?)
10. Tate Modern - my Fav museum. heard there's a slide there we must go try
11. Thames River - romantic stroll together? Haha... - ticked (beautifully romantic at night)
    
12. British Museum - Must see lovely glass roof?
13. Buckingham Palace - we'll walk from St James Park
14. London Eye - we'll just look at it go round round round - 1/2 ticked (lights were off as it was closed)
    
15. Spitalfield Market/Petticoat Lane Market/Brick Lane - The Arty Farty - ticked (Bought alot at Petticoat Lane)
    
16. Tower Bridge - And we'll hope on over to Big Ben and the Houses of Parliment - 1/2 ticked (Looked at it from out of Tower of London)
    
17. London Bus 15 - old style bus the London way
18. House Party - Housemates are having a Hen Party and Leaving Party for their colleagues - ticked ticked ticked! (Great fun *winks*)
    
19. English Breakfast - the Weatherspoon English Breakfast £1.99? - ticked (Best ENGLISH BREAKFAST ever!)
    
20. Introducing my housemates, colleagues and friends - when possible - ticked
21. Borough Market - ticked (went round sampling loads of food, ate alot and bought alot! FAV food market!)
22. H&M and PRIMARK - ticked (More shopping? Well, girls will still be girls!)
    

There's so much to see, so much to do, but such little time. - very ticked!

During the short span my friend, the Cow, had in London. I've tried my best to show her the best of London as much as I could. We walked like mad everyday!

And here's a montage of us in Rome, Italy. Rome was nice. Lovely weather (though super cold in the early wee hours and late wee hours), nice food, best gelato!!! The cow and I spent 4 days in Rome. We walked all day long till our feet hurts. We stuffed ourselves constantly with food and GELATOS! We snapped countless of photos! We tried out 2 different hostels too. And during our last night in Rome, we met an American born chinese lad in our hostel. It was his first ever backpacking trip out of LA to Italy for 9 days. That's pretty neat. Wish I had such courage to go backpacking on my own for a period of time in unfamiliar lands.

Bringing the cow to visit...

2more days to go...

Places I want to show the Cow, things I want Cow to taste/experience :

1. Krispy Kream Donuts - the best donuts ever
2. Knightsbridge - eating Krispy Kream Donuts in Knightsbridge
3. Portobello Market - on a Saturday morning
4. Camden Town - look at another side of Britian
5. Piccadilly Circus/Leicester Square - the area where I work at
   
6. Stockpot - a place to order food from british menu
7. The Wishing Well - great 3 course meal for £7.95
8. Oxford Circus/Bond Street - just like Orchard Road back home
9. Covent Garden - look at some buskers
10. Tate Modern - my Fav museum. heard there's a slide there we must go try
11. Thames River - romantic stroll together? Haha...
12. British Museum - Must see lovely glass roof?
13. Buckingham Palace - we'll walk from St James Park
14. London Eye - we'll just look at it go round round round
15. Spitalfield Market/Petticoat Lane Market/Brick Lane - The Arty Farty
16. Tower Bridge - And we'll hope on over to Big Ben and the Houses of Parliment
17. London Bus 15 - old style bus the London way
18. House Party - Housemates are having a Hen Party and Leaving Party for their colleagues
19. English Breakfast - the Weatherspoon English Breakfast £1.99?
20. Introducing my housemates, colleagues and friends - when possible
    

There's so much to see, so much to do, but such little time.

The cow coming to visit

Hee... Cow or moo moo cow. That's the nickname for one of my friends back home, whom is coming over to visit (coming friday) for a short holiday. Sad to say, we only have 3-4 days in London together as the rest of the holiday we'll be visiting Rome together. I'm really looking forward to it. I've been working like a mad Pea and she's been working like a mad Cow (not mad cow disease, mind ya). Just so we could have time for our holiday. But alas I'm sick right now. So pray hard that I'll be well again before she gets here. :) Erm.. but I've not booked our hostel yet. Tsk tsk.. perhaps we should be a little adventurous and just go find ourselves the hostel when we get there. Haha.. Life will be hell of an adventure. Here we come!

P.S. Thank god my auntie will not be coming with me to Rome. Positive confirmation! *smirks*

And so I borrowed my own shoulders

The last time I remembered me crying my heart out, till my eyes were sore and my lungs tired, was on some cold November night, 2005. I was alone. In freezing Blackpool. It's nearly a year now, isn't it? This time I am (alone) too, but in London.

Maybe I am the kind to bottle things up and then explode once it's reached its limit? This time with no exception. That last time I cried because someone had chickened out, vanishing into thin air leaving all promises unfulfilled and still is. This time, work has driven me mad. I couldn't handle all my tasks with just one pair of hands anymore. It's gotten to a stage where everyone thinks I'm some kinda super woman who could just juggle knives and fireballs with one hand. I'm tired. Very tired. When can I stop and take a rest? Do I have to wait till the day I'm six feet underground to be able to R.I.P?

Perhaps I should go on a course whereby they teach you, a) how to manage your work and life; b) how to manage and/or handle people; c) how to say NO to every requested task that's forever urgent; d) how not to think you are a superwoman and push your workload to others; e) how to talk to your team leaders and perhaps how to talk as well; and maybe f) how to be happy again. Note the 'again'. I used to be happy, carefree, and there to bring smiles to people's life. Now they've robbed me of what I only had. I'm more filled with sorrows than smiles now, albeit the fact that both start with 's'.

Sometimes I wonder why and what am I doing here? No kin, no friends, nobody. Why? No doubt I've come a long way, but made a friend of loneliness. Sometimes I wish I had someone there to share my times with, guess I'm picky with whom I choose. Who could I to blame? No one. No doubt again I've come a long way, and I so hate it when people tell me to give up; to think that I'll always have home to fall back on if all else fails. I do not like that. I know the intention may be well, but it does not encourage nor give me the support and strength I could need to pull through here on my own. I do not like to submit to the fate that I can always depend on home if I fail over here. I like and am proud how I've managed this far in living alone on my own, apart from the fact that I need to learn how to sort out myself, my life, my sorrowful outlook, my being. Remember, I must learn how not to run away again. Oh, someone, please give me the courage I need to pull through this.

I shall find a way to make myself happy again. Who likes reading entries that're always full of frustration, anger and sadness? I don't. I think I'm falling ill. My throat feels sore. Who shall care for me? Who will care for me? Me, myself and I.


P.S. I thought, perhaps looking forward, at least to some comfort in seeking a shoulder to cry on while lamenting a hard day's work after this long tedious day was able to realise. However I gotta laugh at myself - when have I ever been lucky to have such a luxury here? I've not gotten its favour. And so I borrowed my own shoulders.

Finally

It is kinda ridiculous when one expects you to have the redesigned product/website LIVE in the morning at 9.30am so that we can have an email alert sent out to all subscribers to show them "hey, LOOK! We've gotten our product rebranded" on the online product's website before the hard copy actually reaches their hands. Yesh, no problem, I can do that, providing I have a race with the dawn to see who reaches work first. So by right I start work at 9.30am, so now in order to win this race with dawn, what time should I start work?

Anyway I was there already at 8.30am, this is the best I could arrive to compete in my race. And so had I for the past week. Imagine 11 hours everyday! But I'm glad my baby has grown wings and taken off, though not a totally smooth flight, still I manage to get it to fly. It's been really really hard work. Now, my baby is looking much better - organised, clean and unified design for both parent and its child websites.

Thinking finally I'd be able to have some peace of mind after this major baby's done, guess I was wrong...

Sacré bleu

Have a break... Have a Kit Kat

I can't wait for the better times to come. Not that I'm complaining, but this is simply too much for I to bear. Work is getting atrociously hard to manage with all these piling tasks. I've got a major product or rather website to redesign and to go LIVE next Thursday. Time frame was short and given at such short notice too and the current site that I'm redesigning is complicating itself with its many nooks plus confusing navigation plus numerous different templates and its giving me quite a hard time tackling them. I like this bit of challenge in work, at least it's different from what I normally do with the boring mundane tasks. It's fine if it was the only task I have on hand to handle. But I haven't got the luxury of time to, I've got 2 other more products (websites) and many microsites/landing sites to look after. Man! I think I have a headache even as I type this. *shrugs* I'm finding it hard to juggle. I've brought this up to my team leader, she knows, but still I'm dumped with all these pile of shite workload. Is this how working life is like in the UK? I've never worked so hard EVER back home. And I swear it simply just gets harder with each new job. Is this call adulthood?

I do like facing these challenges but I've got a limit to all these. Not that I hate it (sometimes I do), but I need my space to breathe! I can't cope! I need to chill down! I need to get organised (not that I'm not one organised freak)! I need to get into control again! It's not only work that has been keeping me busy and draining me away. My personal life is just as busy. I can't breathe! I need some personal space! I want to and I wish I could just drop everything behind and run off somewhere and have a nice time all to myself, recharge and get back to my hectic life once more.

I need a break? I need a Kit Kat?

Have a break... Have a Kit Kat

SHITTY THURSDAY

I'M IN A BAD MOOD TODAY! LOUSY MOOD! JUST WANT TO MAKE IT KNOWN!

i HATE:

- WAITING

- MAKING MISTAKES

- GETTING PISSED OFF BY RANDOM PEOPLE

- BEING THROWN WITH STOOPID ENQUIRIES WHEN I NEED THE TIME TO DO MY WORK INSTEAD

- CSS NOT BEING COORPERATIVE

- NOT ABLE TO FIGURE OUT WHAT WRONG WITH MY CODINGS, WHY WON'T THEY WORK, BUT WORKS FINE IF I'M USING ANOTHER SET OF EXACTLY SAME CODES BUT WITH A DIFFERENT FILE NAME IN THE CMS

- WAITING, WAITING, WAITING!

- NOT ABLE TO HAVE TIME TO BREATHE AND RELAX!

- ARGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

- ARGHHHH!!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!

- I HATE WASTING MY TIME WAITING WHEN I COULD HAVE BETTER USE FOR IT

NOW I JUST WANT TO CRY AND LET IT ALL OUT AND I'LL BE FINE.

II. Letters from the heart...

II. Letters from the heart...

Thursday, 7 September 2006, UK

Dear Pea,

All my life I've been running. I've been running all my life. Amazing how ironic it is, I hate running, the least thing I would love doing and yet I've been doing it for as long as I can remember. I've been running ever since I could remember. I'm repeating over and over about this, imagine how an impact it must have been on me? I think I'm a runner. You could say that. Or at least that's what I said. I'm running. Away. And it's starting to, or in fact, already has taken quite a toll on me. I'm tired. I just want to stop and stay put - doesn't necessary means literally staying put, I'm mental. I've had enough of this running. Away. When one can't handle; do not know how to handle, one runs. Away. I ran away from home - again not literally; I ran away from people - especially one-who-shall-not-be-named, I lived in fear; now I'm running away from whatever. I'm sick, I cannot run anymore. I'm actually pretty tough, I just forget about that. All the time. Please remind me that I'm brave, fearless, funny (when did that get into this serious letter?), and confident. Why should I be running? Away.

Love,
Pea

II. Letters from within the heart...

II. Letters from within the heart...

Thursday, 17 August 2006, UK

Dear Chestnut,

Could I say that I really fancy you alot? Really like you alot? I think about you alot too. All the time. You're always on my mind and thoughts. I wanna spend time together with you. Hanging out together. Chatting together. I wanna get to know you better. I like being with you. I like to see you smile. I like to make you smile to see your smile. And yes, making you laugh to hear and see your laughters, that too. But you hardly laugh for I to catch.

I like you talking to me, being beside me, hanging out together and enjoying one another's company. I've become so used to your non-existence existence. And one day of not being able to see you or have your non-existence felt or hear from you is sometimes unbearable. I like seeing you, especially on days when your hair looks really cool - is that all I could think of? I like chatting with you. I like annoying you with my nonsensical behaviour and words. You make me feel silly at times and yet so myself. Yet sometimes you make me sad, and really pisses me off as well. Often, you make me miss you too. But I never know how you feel. You don't say. I never bothered finding out.

We have alot in common, maybe. There're so many things we can talk about and feel for, and yet at times nothing, maybe. I like that anyhow. It's really hard to have someone here come by whom I can feel so fun with, with all our common likes and such. Sometimes we can be so silly together. I like that, us being silly when it's time to be funny.

I do wanna be with you, sharing our times together while holding hands, getting connected. I wish to wrap my arms around you, and you I. I want you to know that I really like you, though I feel that we can't really really be together, otherwise it would have; might kill, all the feelings I have for you. This may not be love nor a crush, but more so of a desire to share my life with you where we will blossom into true friendship and be a great companion and friend for each other through life together, perhaps? Am I only kidding myself? I beg to differ?

I really like you loads, but deep down I know you're not the one. Perhaps you might have started forgetting the times we had together, perhaps I ought to move on or perhaps should had. Come what may, I'll be happy to see you happy even if it's seeing you being happy to kiss the some girl you will grow to like and love and cherish one day. Friends should be happy for one another. I like to see my friends being happy. I'll make my friends smile. I like that. No doubt I like you, friend or not.

Love,
Pea

P.S DJ Ferry Corsten's Hearts Connected (Trance mix) playing in the background as I typed...

P.S.S Have I found a mushroom in the chestnut? Maybe.

I. Letters from the heart...

I. Letters from the heart...

Dear Pea,

Friday, 18 August 2006, UK

I received Potatoe's letter. I read the letter. I feel warm. I wish Potatoe's beside me, and I beside Potatoe. I love reading letters from the Potatoe.

Saturday, 19 August 2006, UK

"In your letter, you sounded very 'alone' or should I say emotionally? Isolated? Event though there are housemates and colleagues, I guess the true friendship is the hardest thing to be replaced!"

I told Potatoe that I couldn't agree with her more in the letter. True friendship is distant from me now.

"Where's the Pea whom always have something to crap about and bring light to my darkest days? Come back! Looking forward to your return!"

I will when I'm done with what is needed to be done by me here. I'm looking forward to reunite with my veggie babes again!

Sunday, 20 August 2006, UK

I bought the same set of hearts pyjamas I've gotten for Mushroom. HAPPY BIRTHDAY Aubergine!

Tuesday, 22 August 2006, UK

I'm HAPPY today, because I teased Beef and made Zucchini laughed; because I get to be paid overtime for the certain selected task at work; because I heard from Mushroom - she's safe and fine; because I get to chat a little with my veggie babes; because I got work done too; because I switched to listening to UK's Virgin Xtreme radio instead of Yes93.3FM which keeps disconnecting and I love the english band songs played; because I'm simply happy for no so reason at all; because we went out during lunch time to get a b'day card for the BB (nicknamed Binary Boy).

Wednesday, 23 August 2006, UK

I'm SAD today, because I got up late, left the house late, the tube came late and went real slow; because I was late for work; because I left my lunch at home in the fridge; because the network drives at work are not working fine and slowed down my working speed big time; because I didn't get to speak to my veggie babes; because people do not have the mood to keep to their words.

Love,
Pea

I. Letters from within the heart...

I. Letters from within the heart...

Dear Mushroom,

I guess no other veggie or chestnut or someone will be able to replace your mushroom status...

Thursday, 17 August 2006, UK /

Friday, 18 August 2006, SG

On the day you left, I called you. I'm sad that you won't be around when I'm back. But I'm happy for your new embarkment in life. It's gonna be grand! I'm so happy for you, yet so sad for myself. Fret not for me, worry more about yourself. You've gotta be strong for yourself and take care of yourself now that (like me) you're really really out there on your own. We'll be able to share our experiences being out there really really on our own alone! It'll be exciting, I promise.

Friday, 18 August 2006, UK / US

A day after you left, life goes on as usual I suppose. Things to do, life to taste, people to see, paths to cross. Have you got by? Step foot on foreign land? How does it feel to be there finally? I've not been there. Someday I'm gonna. I will! Right now, you've got yourself a new life to realise and to settle down. To set your feet firm. 3 years to go.

Saturday, 19 August 2006, UK / US

Two days after you left, I wonder how you are. Is the morning air fresher there? How does dawn and dusk differ? Isn't it great to experience seasons finally? It's gonna be fun. Wish I was there to share those with. Maybe one day, someday.

Sunday, 20 August 2006, UK / US

Three days after you left, have you gotten use to the new around you? Are you safe and sound? How does it feel for your feet stepping on non-home ground? Missing home already? Better not, you don't wanna be there (there, as in the home sickness). Trust me.

Love,
Pea

P.S. I'll be waiting for the day where I can give you your long awaited hugs and muacks! Hang on dear mushroom!

II. Letters from the heart to the heart...

II. Letters from the heart to the heart...

Sunday, 30 July 2006 - London, UK

Dear Potatoe,

I miss the times we spent digging through or rather you digging through the pile of stuffs/clothes at FCUK, H&M, accessorize, etc. during the sales. Now I'll have to do it on my own, though not as great a job as you did.

I miss the times we would get lost trying to figure out the right way on the A-Z, and I'll let you handle the navigating from what past experiences tell me. Now I'll have to navigate with what sense of direction I have with the help from people on the streets. Heck it, sometimes I still get lost even with the help.

I miss the times we would hang out and chill in the Richmond Park, Hyde Park, St. James Park, watching the proof of season coming season going. Now I'll have to try get my own arse out. I've made it far only during lunch hours now in the summer with my co-workers from time to time. It just don't feel the same.

I miss the time when we can just bitch about anything, like the old witch and English men for example. Now I'll have to make do with Priska playing your role, however it just don't feel the same and not using Chinese too, even though she's a Libra too.

I miss the times where we will lie in our beds in our big room, chatting about anything under the sun, till we get tired into the wee hours. Now I have the whole room to myself but no gossiping sessions in it anymore.

It has been great this holiday making visa, being on it with you. Thank you so much. No regrets. I will be thinking and missing the good and bad times we've shared during this brief journey in UK. I hope you'll find your direction soon and snap out of this lost direction soon. I'll be there with you, listening if I can't be there in person. Hope some day, we'll be able to travel together again. In the meantime, take great care! You've been dearly miss! Lots of love, muacks and hugs.

Love,
Pea

I. Letters from the heart to the heart...

In the next couple of days or weeks (depending) to follow, I'll be posting a series of letters that I wrote onto my blog - which may be or may not be in order of date, which may have been sent out or may never be send out. Through them you may be able to follow me through my journey in UK, how I change and how I feel. However, please take note that the letters you will be reading may not be of the actual real whole content of the letter/s itself.

So... Here's one for you first.

I. Letters from the heart to the heart...

Sunday, 30 July 2006 - London, UK

Dear Babe,

It's amazing that I managed to get through this job offer right before I was supposed to head home for good this march. Little did we know, there's such a twist to fate and *pooftz* I'm back here again. I admit I was sad when I had to leave UK (for good), didn't want to be back to SG yet as I've not had enough of travelling in the Europe (but I'm back here again). And when I was back in SG, it all felt like a dream, like I've never worked and lived in London before. So contradicting life is. So weird. However I'm glad I'm able to be back here again. The first time last year, the experience was more fun as I had my friend, Potatoe, with me. We have the same asian frequency , we hang out together. This second time round, I'm on my own now. At first it was fun as I was dazzled by all new around me; my new job, new colleagues, new lifestyle in a way without Potatoe. But after a while when I've passed this dazzling phase, it starts to hit me back and I've never been more homesick than ever. I started to miss everything about SG - family, friends, my comfort zone. I was often moody, depressed and anti-social. So I tried getting in touch with listening to chinese songs on Yes93.3FM at work. Haha... now after this homesickness phase is passing, I'm starting to be better already. I guess the many SALES here helped a lot. But poor pockets. I really need to save and start travelling more! Hee... hope all is well for you back home. Sorry if I don't write/email you lot as much as I used to. I'm on the road to my self-discovery now. I'm learning and am lovin' it! Missing you lots! Muacks!

Love,
Pea

跑

每当遇到心理上的问题。我都是一声不吭，转身就跑。
真是个窝囊物呀！难到跑开就是解决问题的方法吗？
那当然不是，但是我就是没有多大的勇气去面对它。
唯一能做到的就是把跑路。
有好多时候想要面对但是还没面对，对方以替我做出了决定。
那就是遗忘以及心碎降临。

Just a Thursday

1. During Lunch Break

I was out on the streets in China Town. I left my colleague to go get me some oyster sauce while she ordered a b'day cake for her boyfriend's birthday party this coming weekend. I was stopped by some oriental guy (English refers to Indians as Asians, and we chinese as orientals or chinese, perhaps) asking for directions to chinese massage shops. He spoke really fluent (China) mandarin.

I pointed in the direction of where he might be able to find where he wants to go, but it can be tricky with the streets, but I didn't tell him about the tricky streets. I just pointed in that direction. He asked if it will cost. Dunno. Maybe at least £25-30 for one? He asked if I was from China. No. He asked if I was from Taiwan. No. He asked if I was from Hong Kong. No. He asked where was I from then. Singapore. He's from Korea. I must say I was impressed. He's tall, single eyelids, small eyes, glasses, nice smile, kinda tan, cute maybe.

Pity I had to get back to work, but first I had to find my colleague again - for she doesn't have her security pass with her to the office doors.Otherwise, who knows, I might had decided to show this korean-who-speaks-fluent-mandarin-guy where he could find the place on the tricky streets. Then I could had tried to find out more about him. How did he manage such perfect mandarin? How did he grow to be that tall? What was he doing in London? Why was he looking for a chinese massage? Questions that are not gonna be answered just because I had the excuse of work waiting for me, of course he does not know. And my colleague needs me to get into the office, and of course he does not know. I simply smiled and walked away. I let the possibility of having found yet another new friend slipped away just like that. I pictured we would hit it off pretty well, and I can speak in the comforts of my mother tongue again. Oh yeah... little miss day dreamer.

2. After Lunch Break, During Work

Emails kept shooting across amongst our screens the whole of the day non-stop. We five (or rather I) couldn't concentrate on work totally. Think everyone's in a it's-not-Thursday-but-Friday mood.

Bits of our email conversations:

ME: I once had a senior who’s absolutely nuts about Garfield. She always wears Garfield Tees to college.

Mark: You had a senior?

ME: Means I'm not in contact with her anymore. Hence the past tense - had

Mark: But that would imply that you could ‘have’ a senior?

Chrissy: Loose translation of “once knew”

Mark: So if I was referring to my old friend allan, I would say ‘I had a guy called allan’

ME: Hi my name is Angela. I come from Singapore. I speak Singlish.

I swear I nearly bursted out laughing when I read that 'I had a guy called allan'. For a moment there I believed I buried my head in my hands and gave out a silent laugh. Oh, hang on a minute, I think the burying of head was to the fact that Mark said he is using a garfield duvet cover now at home as he loves Garfield. Somebody get this guy a lollipop please?

3. Random

-- Trixy reminded me my serious crush back in polyhood whom I had nearly forgotten his existence. Garfield (nickname given by me)
-- Went to watch My Super Ex-Girldfriend after work. Great Laughs
-- Finished reading The History of Love. Nice book. Very different writing styles from what I've been used to. Reading it again to gasp it all in
-- Gotten Trixy's postcard in the mail. Cute little bears postcard. Thanks potatoe!
-- Gotten my long-await debit card, the previous one was damaged. I can draw some cash again!

Happy Birthday Singapore!

Once again it's Singapore's Birthday!!!

Happy 41st Birthday Singapore!!!


Though I may not be home at this point in time to celebrate
Nor catch the NDP glamour on TV at home
Nor stay out with friends to watch the lovely fireworks display
But no matter where I go where I am
My heart still belongs to you!
You've got me in my heart, in my mind 24/7
I LOVE MY COUNTRY!

Birmingham

*SATURDAY*

Went up to Birmingham with Mark for the weekend. We stayed at Joe's place.

Joe's absolutely nuts. Met up with their mates. They are all crazy fun. Hell of a time.

We drank, we chat, we laugh, we happy!



*SUNDAY*

Mark and Joe showed ME around Brum (Birmingham).

Walked about Bull Ring.

Fish & Chips at the Malt House.

Movie - Angel.A - crazy french film.

I made us Chinese dinner.

Tomato + Egg

Chicken + Garlic + Onion + Broccoli

Rice

We had dessert.

Tarte Aux Pommes

Mark, Joe, ME had great laughs!

* from L - R, Top - Bottom*

Victoria Square

Selfridges (Bull Ring)

Balconies

Ferries Wheel

The Malt House

Bull Ring



Mark, Jim

Jon

Susie, ME

Susie

Joe

Mark, Joe

ME, Mark

Jim, Joe



*TAH DAH*

Ingredients of Birmingham



P.S. Sorry, unfortunately Sarah's missing above. She's shy girl.

I'm spiteful

Sometimes I can be quite spiteful. That's what Mark, my colleague, was commenting on me through email at work yesterday. Before that, we were sort of expressing our views on passive smoking being more harmful and some other issues of discussions. I must say our emails, or rather mine was kinda hostile in tone. He said I was just feeling bitter. Oh well, what's gotten into me of late?!

I am bitter and spiteful. Gee... not been much of a good day at work eh. And to add on to that, in the course of the past few weeks; I made a number of blunders at work, forgotten to take my debit card after a purchase at some store in Manchester (was there for a break the recent weekend), had to miss watching the world cup finals as I'm on my way home from Manchester in the train (didn't realised the finals date when booking the train tics), in cranky moods. I'm like a landmine, ready to blow up if not carefully treaded upon.

Could this be a beach-withdrawal-symptom? Missing parts in my life? Good (veggie) friends absence?

Anyway I'll be going to Dance Valley this coming Friday in Holland! Yippy! At least that's something to look forward too! And once I'm back, I'll be able to see Syndy in London! Yay! Think I miss Fab4 too much. This time it really hit me right smack hard now that I'm truely back here in London on my own! Man, it sure is tough! Not that I dislike it, just that it's really taking me quite a bit to realise and adapt. Finally? What took so long?!

Sigh, I don't even know what's gonna happen once my visa runs out. I would love to be back again in the comforts of home but I would also love to be in the comforts of freedom I can get away from home. It's not gonna be easy to get a work permit here I dare say. There's a very high possibility that I might have to pack up and wave goodbye to London next year. There's still so much I want to do and travel in Europe. I find myself racing againt time! Am I just getting paranoid or something? It's only July you may say, but before you know it, winter's gonna come and then spring where I have to leave. Somebody, please smack me! Am I thinking too far? I'm just getting upset and irritated over nothing. Must learn how to relax! I'm trying to! I just want to laugh at myself! Hahaha! Gee, I can be so random.

To end off. I would like to say,"I'm angry because I care. I'm a very caring person."

Nintendo DS Lite - black

Woo la la.. I've just bought a DS Lite today during lunch :) I wanted the white one, it looks really cool. I find it looking like an apple product! I have a white ipod nano! But neh, the white would get dirty easily. So I settled for the black, and no regrets! :)

Mark, my colleague, was in New York the past few days on a business trip. He was supposed to help me get my DS lite there but unfortunately his card had problems with NY. Anyhow he managed to help me get some DS games on my To Get list! Cool! So with the DS games, I definately gotta get the DS lite itself then.

The DS games were much cheaper in US as compared to UK. So I managed to get Harry Potter, Brain Academy, Meteos for £45. That's quite a saving!!! Imagine one game alone could cost about £20 each in UK. My DS had an offer, one game (I gotten Brain Training) + DS at £110, otherwise it would be £99 for the DS alone. That's cool I got 4 games + DS for £155! (All figures are rounded off to the nearest) Now I have a new companion on transportation with me :)

So.... Look out for my reviews on the 4 games in blogs to come.

lovely surprise from the mushroom

:) I got home from work today. Passed the stairs and saw there's a package from Singapore for me. I wonder who could it be from. I picked it up, opened it, and *tah dah* a pressie + letter from Lisi (mushroom)!!! Aww.. how sweet of her! I love surprises :)

It was a lovely scheduler. Perfect! Just what I needed! However here's the twist. If only Lisi had mailed it out to me earlier, I would have been happily filling it out with ink NOW! Unfortunately I bought a similiar scheduler over here too just a few days ago, and ink's already terrorizing within it. So I'm gonna be Super Panda for the next 12 months at least before I turn into Between You and Me. Haha... Thanks Lisi! *MUACKS*

* mushroom = lisi
pea = me

Holland VS Portugal - World Cup 2006

Oh my God! Albeit I'm not really a soccer soccer person, I must say I've never quite enjoyed tonight's match more than ever!

Cristiano Ronaldo crying for getting off the field (bet he should be crying now how lucky to be kept off the remaining of the match and not getting yellow/red card/s), 16 yellow cards, 4 red cards (2 each team), fighting going on behind the referee's back, 6 minutes extra time. Never been more amused. I was hoping that Holland would stand a chance to win, but it seems pretty unpromising as the game played along. I had wished to see both Holland and England playing against each other in the next match. It's been a really entertaining match nonetheless. Never laughed nor cried nor felt more anguished this ever.

I just so loved it when the commentor said,"16 yellow cards.. who cares... it's been ridiculous!"

Hell ridiculous it's been! That's right! LMAO!

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince - book 6

I can't believe the ending to 6th book! Dumbledore's DEAD! Snape KILLED him! I wish it wouldn't have been so. It was so shocking! I was devastated and sad that I teared during the last 2-3 chapters. Dang! Shocker! Heart breaker! But it's been marvelously well written. Great book! I can't wait to read the 7th book when it comes out. And of course like me, there are many other Harry Potter readers out there who has the same belief as I, i.e. Dumbledore's not really dead!

So, check this site out: www.dumbledoreisnotdead.com

"Song" below inspired by above aftermath of reading the book. *giggles*


Title: Beach longing

Whenever I ever wanted to be alone, feeling all down and lost.
All I ever wished to do was to be there by the beach.
Sitting down on the soft sand, facing the waves before me.
Listening to their sound of music, soothing it may be to my nerves.
At least they allowed me to seek some solace and comfrot from.
With no need of a permission or what so ever.
I can freely set my heart free from my sufferrings.
They spread their invisible arms around me with patience.
Alone in their presence I can find myself facing all day.
Admiring the beautidul dawn to dusk I can.


P.S. "They" referring to the waves/beach

cookies

Made some cookies! It had been fun trying to bake! Woo hoo.. It's been over a decade!

Tried 3 seperate attempts (on different days). First attempt had been horrible. I put too much margarine, but it's still tasty. So for the second atempt I put in lesser margarine. And tried putting in some butter for the third attempt as I havne't enough margarine. Tsk tsk... I brought cookies to work from the second and third attempts. They all at work loved my cookies! Even my housemates! *beams* Now they call me the cookie queen. Haha.. My colleagues call me Cake Biscuit (as it tasted so) or Cookie at times now.

But I think my third attempt was the best batch! I'm defiately gonna try a forth attempt! Might try putting a chocolate chunk in each cookie next round. It only gets better. Hee.

Here's the simple recipe I found online:

Soft baked choco chips cookies
1 cup margarine
3/4 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup white sugar
3/4 cup vanilla custard
2 1/4 cup flour
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp vanilla
2 eggs
2 cups choco chips

1] cream margarine, sugar and custard together
2] add eggs
3] add rest except choco chips
4] mix well and add choco chips
5] drop by teaspoons onto cookie sheets
6] bake at 185 degrees

P.S. it was mentioned 1 pkg vanilla pudding, but I couldn't find it, hence used the vanilla custard as the substitute, which I would say turned out really well :)

In the London oven

I’ve never like to curse and swear, but fuck it. It’s like being in an oven out there, especially when you’re stuck in the tube for a fucking hour!!! When it finally budged and got to Acton Town, the whole station has to close. Oh lovely! I love getting delays in an oven due to rail signal probs. Then I hafta walk all the way under the fucking hot sun all sweaty to catch a bus to Shepherds Bush in the fucking hot bus. But I had a fucking pleasant journey in the oven again to Oxford Circus station to change to Bakerloo line to Piccadlilly Circus. Don’t one just love the transport system in London? I know I do. Fuck cares.

*shrugs*

*clears throat*

So… hows everyone coming along back home then eh? Bet the SMRT is never that bad like what happened to me this morning trying my fucking best to get to work in time only to end up near 2 fucking hours late!

A list of choices

Life is about choices.. summer is here. We are all braced with many choices in life... so here's a list of mine. Tsk tsk...

I would either have to get a new pair of jeans or shed some extra weight off
I would either have to get new skirts for the summer or get my mum to mail over some of mine from home
I would either have to get a new pair of sunglasses or squint my eyes under the sun
I would either have to get a new TV or make do without cartoons and drama in my life
I would either have to get a decent shoe rack or scatter my shoes all over the room
I would either have to get a big towel to lay on while tanning or remain fair in the rare UK summer
I would either have to get nice summer dresses or miss out on the perfect chance to ever wear them here
I would either have to get more shorts to wear at home or keep wearing the only pair without washing for weeks
I would either have to get summer open toe footwear or let my feet stink beneathe my covered shoes

The list of things (materal) I want in life. The list goes on and on for sure...

Officially a year

With reference to this previous blog of mine - a month into london , I think it's time to review it once more. As of 24th May 2006, I've now been living in the UK for a year.

Here's my review from last's year's:
Now a month year into London, so what's it about that I'm missing from home? Family and friends excluded as they have always been missed.

1. Radio Stations & Music Variety - There's alot more black music here, not that I have anything against them. They are nice.
   I take that back. I love the music stations here! I think there are lesser radio commercials too! Cool! But I do miss hearing chinese songs over the radio back home.
   


2. My PC & broadband! - I miss stoning in front of my PC in the wee hours doing nothing! Hahaha!
   No doubt about this still! Though I do that here but it's just not the same as back home!


3. Shopping - It's so much cheaper back home!!!!
   Correction: Things back home are getting more expensive. You can get things cheap if you know where to find here. But I think Bugis area is getting greater than before to shop back home. I like it there still.
   


4. Authentic Asian Food - I MISS nasi padang!!!! Pineapple rice!!! Some chinese food here don't even taste nor look chinese!!
   You betcha! I want my nasi padang still!!!


5. MRT & SBS/buses - I miss the aircon and speed. It's stuffy in the transport here when the weather gets hot. It's much cheaper back home too!!!
   The tube/transport system here practically sucks especially during the weekends, what to do since it's been a really old system. Way back...


6. Fruits - Much cheaper! So much more! I want my papaya!
   Exotic fruits like pineapple and papaya and yes, watermelon are rare here, you'll be surprised! And they cost!


7. Bed & Pillows & Bloaster - I MISS my baby bloaster!
   *sobs* But I have my own room now! So yippy!


8. Beaches(Sentosa) & East Coast Park - I MISS Sentosa which had been at my expanse! I MISS all the blading at ECP!


9. Playgrounds - There's one in every estate/neighbourhood you turn into back home! It's hard to find a decent one here! I wanna play on the swing!
   


10. Weather - Though the weather can be stinking hot back home, but it's always summer all year round, just 2 seasons - rainy and non-rainy. I kinda miss those stormy weather at times, especially in the mornings! Snugging beneath my warm blanky with me baby bloaster! I miss the consistence in weather too albeit the fact that I do enjoy the different seasons here. Think I like it here in late Spring - early Autumn. Winter? No thank you. And dang, it's never even snowed here, real snow! None. I must make sure I get to try snowboarding out this time round! Hmm... Come to think of it, this year's Spring is really late. Last year this time, the trees would all be green and full, now those outside my house are still pretty bare, not as full blown as last year's. Oh dear...
    

Ah, but there must be stuffs here that I'm enjoying and liking! You betcha!

1. Cherries & Strawberries - It's their season!! Much cheaper too! YUMMY!!!
   You only get those in Spring mostly. It's nice, I'm finally able to taste fresh cherries and strawberries again :) Just had one minutes ago.


2. Pastry, Cakes, Cookies, Desserts! - Simply heaven! Yummylicious! Wide choices! I simply LOVE the carrort cake at one of the cafe at Sloane Square!!!
   ARGH! I've put on 5kg since last year! I'm horrible! No. THEY are horrible! They can't do this to me!!! (They meaning the desserts, etc.) BTW Krispy Kreme Donuts are the BEST donuts one could ever have in life!


3. Marks & Spencer - LOVE it though not cheap! The food! The sandwiches! Best!
   No doubt M&S is good, but I've found pleasures in the other supermart/sandwich shops here like Waitrose, Pret A Manger, Eat, Fresh & Wild, etc. Yeah! Sandwich here rules!


4. Fashion - Dress as you like! So much more shops, varieties, choices! So much much more! Men here dress up more too! Cool~
   I love looking at people's dressing here! They really good at it! And the guys are so cute here. Hee hee... my eyes are going ga ga... ha ha!
   


5. People - All sorts: weird, funny, scary, cute, charming, cool, interesting, shocking, rude, good, etc. Different mixtures, more than Singapore!
   Yeah, it's fun meeting all sorts! And I have really great new colleagues, and I still keep in touch with the ex-colleagues too. I've been hanging out with them, new or old. And housemates too. Making new friends too. So it's been really keeping me busy.
   


6. MTVs - Yeah and certain shows too, like Will & Grace, SATC, both sexually hilarious.
   Unfortunate to say, I don't have those to watch anymore since last July. But I like some of the local programmes/documentaries. Little Britian's wicked! And the cartoons too! A pity the TV in my room has died on me. So goodbye to Mr. TV!


7. Supermarkets & Sandwiches - Too many choices!
   Yes, refer to #3. I've never had such a hard time with deciding which sandwich or bread to get. I'm spoilt for choices! Wraps are great too! *beams*


8. SALES/Shopping - Only time when things cost cheaper : sales!
   Definately! H&M, Primark, they have been filling my wardrobe. A nice dress at H&M range from £15 (approx. S$45) onwards. That's cheap! But wait... wait till you've heard about Primark! Imagine a pair of shoes for as cheap as £6 (approx. S$18 ), a nice necklace from £1.50 (approx. S$4.50), bags from as cheap as £3 (S$9). Heaven! TK Maxx is another killer too! I try not to get in there and stay away from it as far as I can. However, I gotten my fav. Miss Sixty jeans there at slightly less than £20 (approx. S$60! Imagine you get those for S$300 at least from the boutique!) Now I'm just waiting for the sales to come. I've been spending too much in 2005! I'm now trying real hard to save and not spend too much so that I can go travel more. So far it's been.. hmm I better not say. Let's just put it that I've managed to get to Italy, Paris and Vienna to date in 2006. (I've not spent money on shopping in those countries! WOW! Amazing! How unlike me!) Also planning a holiday or 2 or 3 to look forward to in June/July/August.


9. (Flea) Markets, Museums, Parks - Awesome! I'm fascinated by Richmond Park.
   The markets about Liverpool street area (Spitalfields, Petticoat Lane) I love! Haven't been to the museums much, perhaps I should look into that. Next garden/park on my list must be the Kew Gardens! I need to find someone to come along with me then. Tsk tsk...


10. Stockings & Boots - Good for the cooler weather. Woo lala! I'm gonna wear those!
    It's cool to be able to wear boots here! And nice stockings/leggings too! I wanna get more boots when the cooler weather comes again. For now I'm happy to have summer come upon the cold UK once more! I wanna go about in short skirts/shorts wearing flip flops! Don't wanna put on winter clothes! Figured I had enuff of those! Had enuff of the cold as well!!!


11. Movies - I have always enjoy going to the cinema, just don't like paying for the extortions that's all. However now that's changed! A few of us from work have gathered and form The Cinema Club, where we go watch movies a few times together every month. We all signed up for this Unlimited Movie Pass, for just £13.99 (approx. S$42) per month we can watch as many movies as we want to! That's absolutely freaking fabulous! Woo hoo! In April alone I dare say I've been to 6 movies already! Be it alone or with colleagues. Now dig this! That's what I call a great bargain! It's even better than the Singapore Film Society I'd join back home.
    


12. Clubbing - I love the clubbing scene here! It rocks! Much better music and crowd as compared to back home. However alot of people do drugs here in the clubs, so that bit I HATE! Drugs and drinking here are really a very big problem. Smoking too. Very bad, but music's great! Can't complain to that. Haha... I love Fabric (a club in London)! There're a number of other nice ones as well. Many.
    

So there you go! I dare say I'm still having a great time here, other than the darn HOT weather otherwise perfect. (It's hardly been very HOT the past year. Hope 2006's summer will be better than last year's) Gimme a few more months before asking me once more. *Grinz* I must say that I really am having a fantastic time back here again after starting on my second new job after 2 weeks break from home in March. Though work's getting very stressful and busy lately, I'm hanging on and trying to keep cool.

Think I'm definately gonna miss my life here in UK when I do go home some day. We'll just see how things go then. *smiles* In the meantime, I'm gonna make whatever time I have here well spent. You bet!

I'm just a girl who...

100 things about me... you may not already know...

I'm just a girl who ________________________ every now and then.

1. likes to eat alot


2. likes a hug
   


3. likes the feeling of wind in her face


4. likes to read alot
   


5. likes to stare at people
   


6. dislikes talking
   


7. dislikes being alone sometimes
   


8. dislikes being treated like a baby
   


9. dislikes putting on weight
   


10. dislikes complexity
    


11. loves shopping


12. loves being at the beach


13. loves a nice dessert
    


14. loves being pampered
    


15. loves going to the movies
    


16. hates men's guts


17. hates being taken for granted
    


18. hates being told off
    


19. hates being left out
    


20. hates losing
    


21. does what she wants
    


22. does blush
    


23. does her laundry
    


24. does drink
    


25. does clubbing
    


26. doesn't bathe
    


27. doesn't keep her word
    


28. doesn't care
    


29. doesn't wakes up to her alarm
    


30. doesn't know what to do
    


31. wants attention


32. wants some loving
    


33. wants more money
    


34. wants to know what's on other's mind
    


35. wants people to love her
    


36. needs her own space


37. needs a praise
    


38. needs a good break
    


39. needs a haircut
    


40. needs a direction
    


41. enjoys travelling


42. enjoys meeting new people


43. enjoys a good laugh


44. enjoys having plenty of freedom
    


45. enjoys hanging out having fun
    


46. tries to learn a little Italian


47. tries to cook something different
    


48. tries learning more about herself
    


49. tries to sleep more
    


50. tries eating lesser
    


51. misses her family
    


52. misses the Fab4 very often


53. misses being at the beach
    


54. misses Japan
    


55. misses her bus/tube
    


56. falls from blading


57. falls in love with silly boys


58. falls hard from falling in love with silly boys
    


59. falls for a trick
    


60. falls for stripes / pokka dots / checkereds
    


61. can be responsible
    


62. can be very quiet
    


63. can be very serious
    


64. can be very lazy
    


65. can put a smile on people's faces
    


66. cannot stop daydreaming
    


67. cannot stand laziness
    


68. cannot be bothered
    


69. cannot be provoked
    


70. cannot accept NO for an answer
    


71. feels lonely without the Fab4
    


72. feels sexy
    


73. feels a need to be silly
    


74. feels tired
    


75. feels a need for chocolates
    


76. wonders where do babies come from
    


77. wonders how to rob a bank
    


78. wonders what others think about her
    


79. wonders about the future
    


80. wonders what to do in life
    


81. thinks alot about crappy stuffs like #77 for example
    


82. thinks about what to have for her meal/s
    


83. thinks about boys
    


84. thinks highly of herself
    


85. thinks the world needs better people
    


86. pretends to be a know-it-all
    


87. pretends to be asleep on public transport
    


88. pretends to understand
    


89. pretends not to listen
    


90. pretends to play mind games with people
    


91. gets depressed
    


92. gets what she wants
    


93. gets hyper active
    


94. gets cranky
    


95. gets bad hair days
    


96. has (new) secrets
    


97. has a new top
    


98. has troubles
    


99. has insomnia
    


100. has certain fetish

Monologue

"I guess I've muddled things up again without knowing what's it exactly I've done. It just drives me nuts. They never tell me what the root of it all exactly is anyway. I must have been thick. I really haven't a clue. It just cuts a bit of my heart away each freaking time. No wonder I haven't got any senses left. The nerves and tissues must be so hell of a messed up with each shed. Hell have a must been. What does it matter that I cry anymore. But sometimes I just want to do that anyway. At least it made the nerves and tissues connect for once before they get broken off again. It's mad but at least that works like an asprin for a headache. Except that I don't like or take asprins. It's just insane. I need some chocolate - my asprin. Just need the pain to remind me I'm alive that's all.

"It's actually pretty amusing to find myself saying this but in all these years, I've never spent it, that is my birthday with anyone special apart from my dear girl friends whom I simply adore spending time together with. I never get bored with 'em company. We always have fun times together. Smashing, be it just not talking. Ha, yeah, a few times I thought I could have spent it with someone special, say a guy. It had always been a near hit. But they just slipped away. Chickens. Well perhaps I did, years ago once, but we were great mates anyway. I miss him! That idiot has the cheek to spite me by being in the country I'd've love most to be in right now! He's got the guts I say, yeah. I wanna visit him if I can. It's gonna be terrific.

"Yeah, someone special to make my "just like any other ordinary day" (b'day) special. I think that might have just happened this year though it felt kinda ordinary. Just this one day for now. Just this one special day. Only that one day. After that, it just sorta vanished, disappeared like magic. Guess that's when things just muddled up anyway. I don't give a damn. Afterall I've already gotten my special day. To think that I could actually let this slip away? I did anyway. But I'm still saying it anyway. I just blew it away. I just did and I don't wanna give a hoot at. But I probably guess I'm thinking otherwise. Yeah, me. No matter what, the only two memories I wanna hang onto will just be those two days. The rest I just shouldn't anyway.

"The two memories. That one of him giving me my special day, shan't put that onto the table now. The other where we first met and for a brief moment felt my heart skipped a beat. That sweater pullover gave my heart that missed beat. Any guy caught wearing that, any guy, has got me right there and then. It's such tragedy. To be killed by a mere striped soft grey and pastel soft pink sweater. God damn it! Never wear that! I don't want me dead again. Hell of a sweater that is. Never wear it unless one can carry it off well.

"I'm hoping for the better weathers to come which I highly doubt for a million. I'm really so sick of trying to bring up this weather topic. I don't wanna but ain't it fun horsing about with this weather shite. Yeah. Just had some chocolate off M&S. Less than 99 calorie in one small bar. How comforting that hell of a chocolate bar is.

"I must have been going on and on talking like this kinda no arse shite talk. Ha... boy do I love to amuse myself talking like this right now. I swear I'm laughing. I am, but not the loud sorta, or rolling on the floor grabbing my belly and laughing sorta. None of that. Just a short "Ha" or two. Okay and throw in a few giggles. I'm still a girl somewhere no matter what. I have skirts, tonnes, but I'm always in jeans anyway. Blame it on this freaking weather. Well it's this book I borrowed off a friend that I'm reading now. The Catcher in the Rye. Hell American that feels. It's very mental. I'm half way through though. It just kills me in its own way. I figured I would give it a shot by writing something like it in my own way. Except the fact that this sucks probably. But it's kinda fun."

So If you've enjoyed to this piece of crazy shite, you might probably want to go pick up this book I'm telling ya about. Now, how about that? But beware for the book can be pretty mental. Ha... my deed's done. Think I need something else to feed my mind...

He came down off the shower ledge and came in the room. "Hi," he said. He always said it like he was terrifically bored or terrifically tired. He didn't want you to think he was visiting you or anything. He wanted you to think he'd come in by mistake, for God's sake.

"Hi," I said, but I didn't look up from my book. With a guy like Ackley, if you look up from your book you were a goner. You were a goner anyway, but not as quick if you didn't look up right away.

- The Catcher in the Rye, J.D. Salinger

Check out a review I chance upon for The Catcher in the Rye. Holy shite. Smashing.
http://www.tmtm.com/sides/catcher.html

P.S. Am I heading somewhat towards the way like how Holden Caulfield is in the book? Surrounded by phonies too? Ha ha ha...

Life in mono...

It's been quite a while hasn't it?

It's amazing how fast time flies when one is kept occupied. Alot has been going on about and around me since 2006. It's keeping me occupied but at the same time draining and sucking the energy out of me. New job, new responsibilities, new colleagues, new people, new friends, new travels, new clothes.. tsk tsk... I feel so faded and jaded. How I wish I could express myself like before, freely and be more lively. Pretty tough as I'm feeling pretty numb to just about everything, just name it. Feel as if I were a zombie without any soul. But still there's so many things waiting for me to do and to try and to achieve. No matter what, I'll go on. No soul but yes spirit. Hee hee hee... I figured I'll need more rest or sleep to nurse 'em back. Perhaps a hundred years would be about right. Won't it? Hahaha...

As for now, I'm hoping for the better weather to come upon us. At least that would keep me happy. Yes, you can say that I am quite easily contented. It shouldn't be hard. Why should one try to make things difficult for oneself in order to be happy? Hmmm, but at the same time I think I quite enjoy seeing and making myself sad and take pity on myself. Am I not the only one? I want things to go my way! But it doesn't work that way all the time. Thank you.

I wonder what sort of person have I come to become after this (soon to come) one year away from home, living in the UK? For the better definately! Haha... but it's always very nice to hear from family and friends what have I become. I can be pretty obsess with myself. Self-centered! Narcissism! So what have those who have known me for ages got to say about me then and now? That I've sort of turned mellow? Less lively or bouncy? Tad more serious? Tell me tell me...

Bet you can tell the diff from my past and present blogs anyway. I'm like a case study. Woo hooo... Aite. That's all for now. I'm done with blogging to keep my moodiness at bay.

Ci Vediamo (cya in Italian)

I'm hoping to learn Italian from me housemates, but progress is very bad.

Well well well...

What can I say?
Hell a long time it has been.
For sure that is.
How have I been?
Busy as a bee.
Oh dear, rhymes am I talking in?
I'm afraid not for lame I've always been.
Hahaha....
Lazy is the word I'd say.
Hammer me right hard on my head.
Catch me that is if you can.
Aite, stay tune for more.
If paitence is what you've got.
Who knows this blog be dated once more.


Silly poem by silly me. Grinz. Love it? Neh... I guess not.

Happy Chinese New Year!

I guess it's been a really long time since I last blog in here. First and foremost, I wanna wish all a very Happy Chinese New Year. May the coming of the new year bring everyone happiniess and good fortune. :) I'm sure things will definately be looking more positive for all in the Dog year of the lunar calendar. Things will be turning for the better. Trust me. If not just embrace it with a smile come what may. Darn, have I gone insane with my thoughts. Hahaha...

I'm still in London. Without my family with me to celebrate this Lunar New Year, but fret not for I still have friends here to keep me company. It's getting cold here but somehow I'm getting pretty used to this weather. Imagine wearing a skirt under your winter coat in such harsh weather condition. Thank God we ain't like Moscow, -30 degrees. Man, that's what we should call cold. Think I'm gonna die of heat when I get back home to sunny old Singapore soon. Can't wait to head off to the beach. Roller blading by the coast too! I miss the sensation of the wind blowing across your face, giving you the carefree feeling. Ah! How nice. Mind you, the wind here in winter, no no no, you ain't want it come blowing into your face. Ha!

Ha! Alright, guess I'm being pretty nonsensical. When had I always been sane anyway. Oh dear... Buah ha ha ha!!!